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hopeful

Posted , 4 users are following.

anne1825
anne1825

I am diagnosed to have HSV1 early in 2014. In the beginning it broke my heart upon knowing since I am nurse and I was not being careful. I got it from my boyfriend (ex-bf now) who has been asymptomatic(lucky him). I had a mild outbreak and had it once since my first outbreak.

When the guy who infected me this, broke up with me made me sad and hopeless that I could still find someone who could accept me after him.

I did try to read about herpes and it helped me a lot to understand that somehow it is just ok even I have this.

So i started dating, until i found someone I really liked and who liked me too. I was so scared and confused if i would tell him or not.

But because i didnt want to be blamed or would feel any guilt so I told him.

And I was sad that even I had explained everything about it, he turned me down. I think that was more painful.

I did cry, and felt really bad and again, I felt being hopeless. It took time until I realized that having Herpes is actually a gift. And I hope those who have it would look at it as a gift. Especially those who are single because it is also our way of knowing who can really love us truly. I know this will not be an easy journey but I am hopeful that one day cure will be discovered, or people will be more open and able to understand more about the disease, that Stigma will be eradicated. Lastly,  I am hopeful that true love exists, that one day, the right one comes. smile

 

2 likes, 11 replies

11 Replies

  • Sassy2543
    Sassy2543 anne1825

    Posted

    Wow! I was telling my best friend this exact same thing about how it could be considered a gift. I've told 2 guy since I found out and both were very accepting of it. Things didn't work out with them and now I'm stressing about the possibility of being rejected when I have to tell someone else. However, you are sooo right in the fact that someone who truly loves me will know my worth and herpes won't factor into our relationship. I hope that all of us can take on this view and be able to happy with ourselves and see that we are still the same wonderful people that we were before having herpes! smile
    • anne1825
      anne1825 Sassy2543

      Posted

      Hi Sassy. I know it is not easy to tell people to accept Herpes since it is categorized under STI so we can not blame them if people reject us. Just maybe, we could have the same reaction, we dont know. People will only understand it if they themselves are victims or are in the situation.

      I know it will be challenging for us to find that person that could accept us. at least we have they key to see if someone is true to us or only want SEX. But you are right, you your worth more than others and that i think is more important. 

  • feelbroken
    feelbroken anne1825

    Posted

    I'm so sorry yiu had to experience rejection. How long did you wait to tell him?
    • anne1825
      anne1825 feelbroken

      Posted

      I have been chatting to him for awhile until we met. And on the first meeting, i told him already since we were getting intimate. at first in my mind I told him not because i was asking him to accept me but i was informing him but later on, i felt more sad that i was feeling the rejection. It  hurt me and scared me to get rejected again. But im still talking and open for dating, and i WONT be a COWARD. I will be brave to be honest and still do the confession before getting into intimate relationship because what i know there is always Someone for us. Someone who knows our values more than herpes. and if that someone doesnt come along, you know we always have to view it as LIFE MUST GO ON. smile
    • feelbroken
      feelbroken anne1825

      Posted

      Yeah... Probably not a good idea.. You have to wait for a bond to grow hun and trust for that person. You wouldn't just tell anyone you have herpes right? So this is no different.
    • anne1825
      anne1825 feelbroken

      Posted

      well, that was my plan. like i said we chatted long before we met. Then, when we met it almost like we were getting intimate and i stopped. and he asked me why. I had no choice but to tell. smile 
    • feelbroken
      feelbroken anne1825

      Posted

      You could have just said you weren't ready. Speaking for a long time over the phone and through technology before meeting doesn't really count. For a guy it doesn't mean much. He does not get attached that way. They need to spend time and form a bond first.
    • feelbroken
      feelbroken anne1825

      Posted

      Well good.. Glad to hear... I know it sucks and it means long periods w no sex, but maybe that's for the best.. Not giving yourself to just anyone
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