I cannot change the past

Posted , 7 users are following.

I cannot change the past and I am angry and hurting, my family is torn and everything Is my fault. I cannot do anything right and I make bad descions all the time.I have no support from anyone. I feel so alone with this.

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12 Replies

  • Posted

    No body can ever change the past but its there for a reason it hepls us to remember good and bad times it helps us learn about mistakes and decisions we have made if you always make bad choices then always do plan b every decision has to ways a good and bad just think about what would happen either way and choose the best one that benefits you 

    you will soon find that you will make thre right choices in your life and your family will notice to just stop and think it may only take a second but a second can last a lifetime if its the right choice  

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  • Posted

    Can everything really be your fault - I doubt it.  Who says all that is wrong is your fault?  If you feel as if you can get nothing right and make wrong descions then slow down and ask yourself why, who or what is influencing you.  If it is others that are making these claims, do they know all the facts and is their opinion of any matter?  

    None of us can change the past, only learn from it,  try and give yourself some space from those who are causing you to feel this way.  Find ways to relax and allow time to pass so that whatever raw feelings are running high at the moment can settle down,  maybe every one concerned will see things a bit clearer as the situation cools down.

    Best wishes,  Jessie.

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    • Posted

      Thanks Jessie for your reply. It Is not everyday simple descions that is affecting me It is a bigger picture which i don't want to disscuss on here. It has affected other peoples lives ie family, I live with so much guilt and regret and get so much ***** in my life. I will try not to beat myself up about it everyday. It Is hard thou.

      Moderator note: Expletives have been censored

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  • Posted

    I feel the same Elizabeth, I joined these forums a few months ago because I feel the same as you and felt alone but I couldn't bring myself to put up a post, I haven't been on here since until now when I saw your message by email.

    The fact that you have posted and already have a reply shows your not alone. I know how you feel without knowing facts, I feel the same. Have you spoken to your doctor about how you feel? I am currently going through the process as I too find it hard to move on from the past and focus on any kind of future, the doctor had put my on antidepressants and I shall be having talking therapy in the next few weeks.

    If you would like to private message me for a chat feel free too. It feels a lot of the time when you feel alone that your the only one but a lot of people do I guess that's why these forums exist

    Hope your alright

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    • Posted

      Thanks Rose, I am glad you feel that you can post on here as there is a lot of support, nobody knows you so it It is safe. My issues are not simple and has hurt a lot of people, not intentionally. I will pm you has I am not comfortable with sharing too much information here. Thanks for taking the time to reply.
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  • Posted

    My children who have grown up now have told me and my ex wife that we are not required anymore , so that does hurt us all, but will be hear when they need us !

    You need to move on think of doing things that you would like to do. Meet new people even selling up , changing jobs getting involved in other matters that takes your fancy, be more positive with you self.

    Alexander.

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    • Posted

      Thanks for replying. I am sorry your children have said your not required anymore, It can be hurtful, but has you say you will be there if they need you. I am not  working at the moment has I have mobility problems. I appreciate your advice and I will try to find some groups to join as I haven't a partner, I am so alone at times. I have no support or anyone I can talk to which Is why I posted on here. 
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  • Posted

    No one can change the past I've made my fair share of mistakes probably more than most but life is hard and it doesn't come with a book on how to live it we all make mistakes it's what makes us who we are and I'm sure at the time you thought you was doing the right thing I've made some awfully terrible mistakes but no one is perfect so plz don't judge yourself or feel bad your probably a really nice person well you must be cause it wouldn't bother you now if u wasn't plz if you need to chat there are some lovely people on her whom have helped me so much so don't be alone xx
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  • Posted

    There is no future and there is no past. I think Buddhist monks have it right. The past is especially not worth it because it can't be changed. What you can change is what you do now. I agree with Jason. Try mindfulness it focuses on acceptance and the here and now and it's definitely worth reading into. Meditation might help you too, its got loads of scientific backing and has been proven to lead to calm, relaxation and even lower blood pressure. I'd recommend 5 minutes meditating on your breathing each day.Serously if you can do that it really helps.
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