I dont even know what I have

Posted , 5 users are following.

Im not sure that i got anxiety but I will try to explain. I'm not really good at opening,even anonymously but I will try to because i really am desperate. So for the past year or so I've been feeling really strange. Everyday when I wake up, i feel scared of my thoughts because I feel i cant control them and  they always end up torturing me. It sucks because I cant really tell what I have and how I can make it stop. When I realize that im not mentally healthy and im actually never really relaxed I get panic attacks and it gets worse. I really dont know what to do. My parents are very good people but terrible parents. I've told them and they definetely care but they dont think its serious enough even though i keep telling them that im suffering. They may have caused this anxiety in a way because they blame me all the time and say that im not any good and my mom is sad because she is alone and bored all the time and she yells at every little thingy and stopped caring a long time ago but anxiety kicks in when i think those kind of things. I dont have control of my thoughts most of the times and its really hard paying attention to class or even concentranting on simple things like music or movies. I've been searching things in forums and I came across this, which I thought was really accurate in my case, so im just gonna copy it here: 

It sounds a lot like anxiety. 

When anxiety starts to kick in,  the person experiencing it is usually the last to understand what's going on. 

Anxiety can cause you to be short tempered.   Instead of feeling free and spontaneous, you will be edgy and controlled.   

You'll feel separate, like you're so aware of yourself that you can't focus on anything outside of yourself. 

Any imperfection will cause you to withdraw. 

Something as insignificant as a pimple can make you feel hyper focused on yourself.  This is brutal, because you're already feeling pretty damaged. 

Anxiety turns your spotlight inward.   

Instead of watching people and observing life like you used to,  you now are locked inside of your own head.  You will be aware of everything you think,  say and do.   Nothing comes naturally for you anymore. 

You feel like you're losing your personality because anxiety has taken its place.   What people are seeing isn't you.   Your personality is being obscured.

Anxiety is relentless.  It doesn't tend to go away on its own.   You have to deal with it head on in order to get past it and get your life back.    

Many people have anxiety,  so you're not alone. 

A good place to start is by connecting with people who have successfully overcome it.   Ask them for advice.  Get therapist recommendations.  Get phone numbers of people who are willing to guide you through your healing process.

Having people who understand what you're dealing with is huge.  They'll help you find your way through this.

Ps. There are also many things i think i need to say in order to explain, but im not sure this is gonna get any answers so i dont wanna get my expectations too high. 

Ps2. Sorry for not making sense sometimes, english isn't my native language.

Thanks in advance,Happy new Year! :D

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6 Replies

  • Posted

    You really could use a good counselor right now who you could vent to and who would really listen to you and give you tools to overcome your anxiety

     you have a lot going on with your parents etc. and anxiety and panic can really feel awful! You shouldn't have to live feeling like this all the time.  It is often difficult to overcome on your own so see if your parents could help you get some counseling.   Emphasize to your parents how bad it is and that you really need to talk to a counselor.  If they won't, is there someone at school perhaps a school counselor you could talk to who might be able to speak with your parents and convince them you need some help with this? 

     I would just hate to see you not being able to get help with this. 

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  • Posted

    Hello Nick

    I feel that you need to find oit what triggered your anxiety. You mentioned that your parents are good people but terrible parents and do not understand you.

    Have you spoken to anyone close by about this.

    You are bound to feellow etc if you are being constantly told off or criticised.

    You are your own person. You know your own worth. Your self esteem can be built up, you can feel confident about yourself, your decisions etc.

    You have your life. You have not lost anything. You are still you.

    You are young and have your life ahead of you. Youcan rid these negative , intrusive thoughts and feelings as well as the panic attacks. It is possible. You have done very well because you have taken the first stepin writing to this forum and you have expressed yourself extremely well. You are obviously a very intelligent person with the quality of deep understanding and perception.

    May I enquire if you have anything in mind as a career?

    Are you hoping to go on to University?

    ​Plese velieve in yourself and try to ignore these hurtful remarks from your parents. Look forward tto getting your exams and choosing a career etc. You have the world at your feet.

    Take care. You are amongst friends here.


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  • Posted

    How old are you? Are you legally old enough to not need a parents signature or representation at a doctors? If so make an appt to be seen and ask for a referral to a counselor..

    Your parents I'm sure are trying, but it sounds like maybe your mom might have an illness of her own, whether it's depression, etc..

    Sounds like classic anxiety or a hint of depression. Just try to learn that though your parents aren't that great of parents, I'm sure they try in their own ways. Some people just don't have it in them to be parents, and that's ok.

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  • Posted

    Talk to your GP and explain your concerns, make a list like you post above and that will enable you to get your problems across.

    Your GP will hopefully write a referral for a course of treatment.

    If you know the reasons of your Anxiety that can help you come to terms with it and you may be able to move on. The CPN will be able to help you come to terms with your condition


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  • Posted

    First of all, I didnt expect you would be so helpful. Thanks to everyone for replying, it really means a lot. I felt much better when I shared my problem here and even better when I read your replies. You all got a great way of talking and it made me feel understood. I didnt clear out that i just turned 18, finished school last year so I'm in the 1st year of University, studying Journalism.I've really thought about talking to someone qualified but I don't know how I can find someone. Thing is I live in Greece, where the Health Sector is really messed up and it's really hard for me to make an appointment or something.I really think it would be so much better if I shared my problem in a real-life conversation with someone who would listen and understand as there are lot of things I need to adress in orded to be understood completely. Thanks to everyone,really. I do appreciate that there are people in this world that are willing to spend their valuable time for someone they haven't met just to help him.

    Claire, you are very kind. Thanks for your reply, it really gives me strength and optimism about the future.

    Thanks to everyone for caring.

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