i feel like I'm losing it......REALLY

Posted , 13 users are following.

does anyone else actually feel like they are losing it? I still get my periods somewhat regularly, but i feel so weird and spacey and anxious so much of the time. been using sleeping pills these past 8 weeks too but need them as its worse when i havent slept. Just wondering if anyone else really truly feels or has felt this bad....some comrade and hope is what i need. im being quite serious here....

 anxiety and depression like ive never known and im so spacey..i go to worst case scenario and even though just last summer i was travelling the world snorkelling in hawaii i can only just manage a quick dip in the ocean now and i remind myself that i CAN do IT, that I LOVE the ocean....but even that i have to do that saddens me...BUT ATLEAST i went in huh?!

and im getting a massive arse and thighs too but i eat really healthy as i lost 8 kgs quite quickly this year then started regaining and in the past month have gained 3 KG!!! all on my cottage cheese arse...

i feel like i dont know my body, ( im scared of everything feeling/sensation/sight of menstrual blood), or my MIND!!!!  I keep my emotions to a small range of anxiety, fear, doom and sadness LOL but its kinda true.....oh sometimes i throw in an irritated just for fun...

 i dont even know if i am perimenopausal... other than this anxiety came out of the blue it feels and im 45.. thats it for my syptoms oh and HUGE amount of underarm,  hair, forgetfullness, bachaches, sore boobs, tired 

can ANYONE relate???

1 like, 10 replies

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10 Replies

  • Posted

    Vix, your post could have been written by me! It's like one day I just started to feel weird. I have spells of dizziness and just feeling strange. I have thought so many times in the past several months I am about to die. I always tended to anxiety but this now is on a new level. My brain feels spacey and my heart races. I wake up every morning with an immense back ache, that is when I can actually sleep through the night and not wake up in a severe panic. This fear is something I have never known. The only thing that makes me feel better is just walking and sometimes I just don't feel up to that. I ended up in the ER a few weeks ago because my heart was racing and I thought I was dying and my heart was racing.They basically told me to get out because nothing was wrong with me which was a relief but it's like something IS wrong. I know my body. I never knew anxiety and heart palpitations were a part of this. I just feel like a dried up hag and I am only 40.   Last night I did manage to think my way through an almost panic attack and I told myself....it's just hormones and you're not dying and went back to sleep.

    We are strong women!!!!!!! We have made it this far in life and together we can get through this! Hang in there and so will I. 

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  • Posted

    Yes, I feel all of these things as well. no hot flashes yet tho, but I won't be surprised. 

    I seem to have different things everyday too, one thing finally mellows out, and a new one starts. 

    The day before yesterday was horrid, then I started my period and realized why I felt so bad. Knew it was coming, but didn't realize why the weird pains and panic and heavy head. (I started a discussion about it that day because it was freaking me out so bad I needed to hear from other women here that they've felt it too, I was panicking) 

    Yesterday was not "as" bad, and today was GREAT.....all the way through until about 8pm tonight and then BAM...out of nowhere, tight chest, tight feeling in my throat, and the "whoosh whoosh" sound in my head. 

    Started about the same time my advil from earlier wore off that I took for cramps. 

    I don't run to the doctor when I freak out because I CAN'T, no insurance, and with USA prices of insurance, some of us just can't afford it, or we don't qualify for medicaid (governement/free) 

    So I've had to learn very quickly to take some comfort in research and reading and I get my comfort from THIS BOARD lol. 

    You are NOT going crazy, (this is what other ladies tell me when I ask that question anyways haha) 

    I do know how you feel, and so many on here do as well. 

    One thing I've been wondering though, is that it seems that this is starting in younger and younger women. Does anyone else notice or think that as well?? 

    My mom didn't start having these issues until well after 50. I'm not sure though if she remembers it all, because her main thing was hot flashes, though she does suffer from anxiety anyways. 

    How about your head or headaches? Do you ever get that "sound" in your head? Almost like a throbbing but it's not a "pain" it's more of a sound or "feeling"? 

    I truly hope that hearing and talking her to others helps you. This whole thing sucks really bad if we didn't have each other it'd be ten times worse. Sometimes I feel better JUST reading everyones posts, even if I'm not chiming in :-) 

    Hugs to you 

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    • Posted

      Cforce....I can identify with the whoosh whoosh sound in your head that you speak of. You described it better than I ever could. I have that "sound" accompanied by periods of dizziness and just feeling out of it. 

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    • Posted

      Ivey have you been to doctors about that "sound"? 

      I'm so glad you can relate. It's worse this month during my P. week than usual. 

      Head also feels "tight" during it, and yeah dizzy comes with it sometimes too.

      Tonight I have minor chest pain with it, and noticed when I just laid down to go to sleep my stomach is gurgling like a dang ocean lol. 

      Sooooo many crazy little things!! 

      I think my most annoying/aggravating symptom and the one that scares me the most with health anxiety, is that whoosh whoosh lol.

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  • Posted

    I have just had a UFE about 5 weeks ago since then have been having awful thoughts that I have bowel cancer on beta blockers to try help. I keep asking them to test me for the menopause but they won’t am 46 just feel like am anxious all the time but sounds like what the menopause is like having broken sleep with anxiety help?? 
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  • Posted

    Me too, Vix, everything (seriously) you've said plus the wooshy head. You have a whole army of comrades on here! Xx

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  • Posted

    Vix72, yes of course we can relate.  You are at the perfect age for perimenopausal symptoms.  (that 10 year period before menopause begins)   One of your first clues was that your periods are "SOMEWHAT regular"  This indicates that you are experiencing fluctuations in your hormone system.  And YES, this is perimenopause.  What once was a well regulated system and consistence 28 days (approx) is changing.  

    It's not uncommon for women to feel out of character with their normal self.  

    I'm sorry you are going through this, we all do.  

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  • Posted

    I feel exactly the same! I'm 42 and peri and on hrt! I feel my life is over, I cry a lot, I spend my time googling about menop and I don't recognize myself anymore! I m afraid  I ll lose my mind and I'm isolated and very sad. I'm in the same boat! 🌺

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    • Posted

      Hi Vicky, understand what your going through, as a menopausal person myself I could relate to this..I was once isolated and wouldn't come out the house..I use to have to make appointment with myself to get through the door Lol..I had to force myself to go shop and when I went to do my food shopping when I get to the till my heart would take off,I would start shaking can't stand up it was horrible how I got through that I don't know I will never know..this is how i see it hormones picks up on what you are thinking and if you try to stop yourself getting on with life it will stop you,so what ever you say it will act on it if that makes any sense but I know it's horrid, I stop the googling it makes me worst because it tells you things that aren't true,are the HRT working for you Hugs.

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    • Posted

      Thanks for replying Maria! Thanks God, HRT works for me! I have no symptoms but I'm afraid of breast cancer...I prefer the quality of my life I think! I will take hrt until I die I think. I have to go on with my life but I'm very very sad. I feel too young for meno. 😪

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