I feel like in about to die soon. Am I going crazy?
Posted , 8 users are following.
I was recently diagnosed with a mild anxiety disorder about 4 month ago. I haven't been able to shake this feeling since. The first time it happened I felt as if I was going to die. Since then I've been to the emergency room on two separate occasions, and have been having attacks at least once a week. Doctors say it's anxiety. Even when I'm not edgy or anxious my heart races regardless at times. I always walk around with pressure on my chest. I've already seen a psychiatrist and he has referred me to a psychologist. He also suggested I see a cardiologist to be sure it's nothing with my heart. I'm 34 very active male with a job that keeps me busy. I've never thought in my life I'd ever be going through something like this. I feel light on my feet and always on alert. Always paying attention to my heart rate and pressure I'm feeling. I feel like I'll die soon. Some weeks are better then others. This is my 4th month living like this. I'm not sure how much more I can take. I feel like giving up and giving in sometimes. Just let myself be taken by whatever it is that's trying to take me. People in my life don't understand how it feels and how it changes your state of mind. Everyone says "relax." It's not that easy. I feel like I'm losing myself. Does it get better? Has my mind just taken over?
1 like, 14 replies
mitouback Guest
Posted
I was diagnosed with Cancer 12 months ago, andalthough Im in remission, my C has rhe highest risk of reoccuring...
This makes me ultra anxious, all the time..Mors so now; 8 months after last chemo..Every little pain I get- whether its in my arm,on the head, in stomach on the neck or in the chest, I feel faint and dizzy with anxiety..
Its horrid. I try my hardest to shake it. I have started to meditate and practise mindfulness.. Its tough..
I am getting a cat next wk. Soemone said that an animal will help..It will be good to try..
Oh whayt a mess...I got coxxyc pain the other day and thought the cance had spread to my tail bone...I couldnt sleep or eat..I went to hopital and was told to hold off for 10 days and relax, not use the gym and try to unwind more....
Best of luck..Try what I am trying;
meditaion group, mindful thoughts, massagr and aroma therapy and an animal???
Mitou
Guest mitouback
Posted
Thank you for the response. Sorry about what you're going through. I've also been doing meditation and mindfulness. Also been thinking of getting a pet. I just wonder if it'll get worse before it gets better. The fear of losing myself and control is what troubles me. I refuse to be on medication. The side effects and withdrawal symptoms don't appeal to me.
mitouback Guest
Posted
Try not to LIVE in the future's what if??
Try, as I'm doing, to live for the MOMENT.
Get that pet.
Lol
Mirouback
thomas44921 Guest
Posted
Hello Nelson,
I can relate to what you are going through and it is a horrible experience. Relax and don’t panic are the two worst words to use from people who do not understand.
My therapists describes anxiety as living in the future. Is there anything particularly troubling you coming up?
I was having attacks 2/3 times a day and they started just out the blue. Everything seems off, you're senses are heightened, yet you feel constantly dizzy and unbalanced. Tightness in chest and incredibly high heart rate, for a week I convinced myself I was going to have a heart attack or stop breathing!. I am only 25 and was a reasonably healthy guy until the anxiety took over.
The hardest part I found is the constant brain fog, every little task takes incredible amounts of effort and you’re stupidly tired all the time. My job is data intensive and I just couldn’t function, some days I could barely read the screen!
It sounds like it's definitely anxiety - maybe more health anxiety now as the physical side effects have become so noticeable that it’s become a focus for you. That’s the circle that drives anxiety sadly, it’s driven by a thought process of over analysing ourselves.
Yes it does get easier when you accept it (without sounding cliché. I spent ages trying to work out what was wrong with me (googling symptoms is a definite no) - two trips to A&E and multiple doctors’ visits say I am healthy, but I can't shift the constant tension headaches, dizziness and disconnected feeling. I have found it incredibly difficult to function at work as well to the point of getting signed off now.
Have you done any therapy? CBT has helped me a lot. Propranolol also helped to take the edge off the physical side effects of anxiety. I started on 80mg slow release which was way too much for my build I think. Dropped down to 10mg x3 per day and it was fine. You get a bit drowsy but it’s nothing compared to the constant panic attacks. It’s allowed me to function more as well.
I still have attacks, though not as bad. It's trying to control your busy mind which I found out to be the hardest part. Propranolol doesn’t clear busy thoughts and I flat out refuse anti-depressants.
I have found (as stupid as it sounds) writing down your worries helped the most. Everything, no matter how little a worry it is. When you notice after a few days that you keep writing the same worries down each day – I.E high heart rate, something clicks. You can then start to tackle blocking the vicious circle of worry, which is driving the anxiety.
This website helped a lot, it explains literally every symptom I was getting! Hope it helps.
http://www.get.gg/d/anxiety.htm
Guest thomas44921
Posted
Thank you for the response. It's not easy. I'd like to meet others going through what I'm going through. Many friends on mine don't really understand. Relax and don't panic are always the words of reassurance. I hope in time I can phase this out.
cia42277 thomas44921
Posted
Writing down the worries is brilliant. Most of us don't realize we are telling ourselves and others the same story over and over. Helps us realize it's time to create a new story. I find that with anything I do that is not productive, when I see it, I get sick of it myself...easier then to create that new story. Regards
cia42277 Guest
Posted
Good idea. Have you googled for local support group? If you don't find one there, call every church pastor or priest to see if they host such a thing or know of one. Put an ad in the paper. I did that and got 2 responses. Good luck.
jmcg2014 Guest
Posted
cia42277 jmcg2014
Posted
I just saw that you have a therapist. If he doesn't know of one, maybe he would create one?
mitouback Guest
Posted
You are not going to die today or tomorrow...
See if you can find someone that works as a cranial sacrum therapist.. That treatment is helpful. As is breathing exercises with help of maybe a therapist thT can talk you through the breath.. as to speak.
Valerian drops in a glass of water as you get up and when you go to bed.
Anxiety is troubling but it's really only you that can help yourself..
It'll be fine.
Have trust
Mirouback
cia42277 Guest
Posted
I'm going to suggest something most people don't or won't do. Google ADRENALINE AND ANXIETY, then open a few of the sites and read. The what, why and how of anxiety is clearly addressed better that I can here. This is a great step in taking back your life, your body and your mind. Let me know what you think.
Netminder1976 Guest
Posted
I'm about in the same boat as you. This also started about 4 months ago and been nonstop ever since. There were some days that weren't as bad but every one had at least some anxiety in it. Mornings are always worst for me, by the time it's night I am usually feeling okay but not perfect. I wake up and it hits as soon as I do. It's like an uncontrollable feeling of doom and impending danger for no reason. It feels like I need to take off running for my life and I can hardly face anyone at that point in the morning. I'm a 39 year old male and it pretty much started when I thought I had heart problems. I got my heart checked out with blood work and an EKG and they said everything was fine. I still worry about it though even after being told this. I sure do hope you can find some relief soon. This is no way for us to be living.
kimberly59704 Guest
Posted
Sounds so familiar. Been there, done that and more. Why aren't you on medication. This anxiety will drive you nut's. Your family doc should be able to take care of this. Most of the time we don't know why this crap happens, but once it does, we spiral out of control, with fight or flight and gloom and doom. Constant state of angst. This probably will not go away, without meds. My doc asked me if I needed to talk to someone, and I didn't so that was the end of it. She put me on meds, and now I am (normal). I will be on them for life and that's ok with me. After years of a med or a side effect, I just went to something else. Doesn't sound like a mild case of anxiety to me. It can quickly get out of control. Phychologist can't perscribe meds. Please don't sit around and wait for this nasty anxiety and panic to go away, cause it will get worse. It's a chemical imbalance in the brain. Best of luck to you!!!!
cia42277 Guest
Posted
Nelson, kimberly has said it all. When I was at my worst, I went to urgent care, got on meds, and I got my life back. Please give yourself, your mind, your body a rest. It is what you needed to hear right now. Hugs and a big smoochie on your cheek.