I feel lonely

Posted , 5 users are following.

Um hi! I'm not very sure how any of this works (first time ever posting anything on a forum) but I'll try my best to explain what's going on in hopes of some advice. I'm a pretty social person around people that I know well and I have a few friends. But the problem is: I don't share almost any of the same interests with these friends and that makes me feel so lonely because I can never talk about my interests without feeling like I'm annoying them because they don't know what I'm talking about. And because of this, I've been feeling really lonely and that loneliness has led me to pretend like I am having conversations with people that aren't there. It's not like I'm seeing things, I'm not. I just have developed a habit of having imaginary conversations with people. I'll sit down in my room and just look to my side and smile and laugh and talk and go on and on about some film I just saw or something of the sort, pretending that there is someone there talking to me. No one knows about this, I'm often home alone. The main problem is, I've started to do this without even noticing..in public. It's only happened a few times in public and I was very subtle about it, but it made me feel weird. I'm sorry this was so long, if anyone does take the time to read this...is this normal? What should I do to stop it? What should I do about the friend thing? Please help! (Im putting this under the anxiety thing  because I have anxiety and I don't where else to put it. Sorry if it's not anxiety related I guess)

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  • Posted

    i have general and social anxiety and i do the same thing. the best description i can find for it is maladaptive daydreaming, but i think in my case it might be a result of rehearsing conversations because the social anxiety can make having them without preperation very difficult. since you can't talk about your interests with your friends, you may consider that you are practicing to make sure you have something that you can talk about? since you know that you are in control of the people you are 'talking' to, and that they aren't real, you can rule out personailty disorders like split personalities. so for the most part then, what you're experiencing is normal. you should really only worry about it if youre losing huge chunks of time without remembering your conversations (which would indicate a personality disorder). i know it might sounds stupid, but trying to find some new friends might be a good solution. if you have social anxiety or don't want to bother, i've found that writing about my interests or whatever i would normally 'talk' about can work as a diversion and stop me from talking to myself.

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  • Posted

    Have you thought of joining a support group of some sort? Perhaps  ask a minister, priest, your doctor, etc. My sister found a needed support group for divorced people which helped her get over an ugly divorce and withdrawal from people. She now sees some of them socially. An old friend I no longer live near, found a support group for lonely people. I believe through a church she used to go to. Not a religeous group, just that the minister knew of a group.

    As to the rest, i am very used to living alone and have a few friends that live in other states or countries. I do enjoy talking to them all by myself, and laugh at myself for doing it, but still do it. I've done that for years. I was just outside looking at the stars talking to my sister (who isn't here). I understand a lot of people do that. I talk, laugh and tell jokes to myself all the time and thoroughly enjoy it. I have no problem talking to strangers, neighbors, etc. but I still enjoy my alone chats. I had a radio show for years and gave seminars, etc......and I still enjoy my own chats. Don't make too big a thing our of it, but do consider a group of any sort that appeals to you. You'll be okay, and you can always "chat" here.wink

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  • Posted

    My son has been doing this,for a long time. He laugh's and talks, and has a really good time with himself. We, his mom and dad, we laugh about it. He has always been a loner. He has two friends that he hangs with from time,to time. Most of the time he hangs with himself. It is perfectly fine if you are comfortable with yourself. Don't stress so much about it. Don't know how old you are,but if your in school, find a friend that has your interests. If you work, you are meeting people. Wishing you the best. 

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