Posted , 3 users are following.
So I am rapidly approaching my 40th year on this planet and I still haven't got a clue where my life is going. I suffer depression, which since splitting from my wife has eased somewhat, though the divorce is still ongoing (and being an emotional psychopath, she is stringing things out in a big way and causing way more problems than there really should be). Updates on that tends to send me on a rapid downward spiral for a fair few days and I'm pretty sure it's being intentionally awkward for the fun of it.
I feel that I have turned to alcohol far more than I should have, I make some really bad choices when intoxicated and although I always say to myself "never again" the days after, I always seem to go back to it (which is worrying me!).
I'm really tired of being alone (the last 2 years have been the first time in my life of living on my own), though I now have some trust issues, my wife was a big trigger and the subsequent women I've met have been very strange in their conduct (disposable attitude towards relationships). I am aware that some people will aim at me being the issue, as I'm the common component. That said I they have demonstrated some really crappy behaviour towards another human.
It's seriously making me contemplate swearing off relationships altogether (before 2 years ago I've been in steady long term relationships so it's not like I'm consistently doing douche behaviour)
Am I just expecting to much from other people?
Anyhow, I changed job recently which has helped. Though I still just feel like I'm drifting through life, it feels strange that I'm this complacent, as I know we only get one go at this stuff!
Any advice would be appreciated
0 likes, 4 replies