I have no idea what I want to do with my life and I think I might be getting depression from it

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So I'm currently a freshman in college, an undecided engineering major, and was planning to be a management for engineering and manufacturing major. I know you may be thinking "woah that's a hard major" and I know it is. I had excellent grades throughout my years of public school. I even graduated in the top ten of my class. I was great at math and science and though it would be a great way to integrate that into a career. Plus the pay is pretty great. Now I've actually started college and a month in I feel like just running away and never coming back. Other kids seem like they actually know what they were doing, are excited to learn in their classes, and look like they'e enjoying themselves. I on the other hand am experiencing the opposite. I have no idea what is going on half the time. I just feel like this engineering thing (or maybe even college in general) just isn't for me. I lost complete interest in actually learning for my classes. I just don't feel happy. I don't know what I want to do or who I want to be. I've been having mental breakdowns almost every day or every other day. I don't know if I'm developing depression or anxiety or anything. All I know is that I just don't feel okay. I have been having thoughts about changing my major. My whole childhood I wanted to be en elementary school teacher. I love children and was always playing "school" as a child, but was told by others that my intelligence (if I truly even have any) should go towards something else. And I also realized that teachers don't get paid as much as they should and I didn't want to live like my parents and have a hard time with money issues. I could go back into being completely undecided and possibly find a passion in something else, but I don't want to spend even more money on college by taking classes that won't even be towards my degree. I know this whole thing may sound completely confusing, but I just feel so lost and I can't take it anymore not knowing what to do and having these mental breakdowns every day just by having a thought about my future.

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  • Posted

    Hi!  You need to go to college these days for gainful employment and SELF ESTEEM.

    I suggest going to your college advisor and switching classes immediately.  I don't know how easy or hard that will be, but you have to get out of what you are doing now.....with lack of intrest...you will only fail.

    Your future will be bright....if you find what it is you WANT to do...sounds like teaching is a better option and a dream and passion for you.  Don't give up because you will really get down on yourself..

    Let the college help you...where there is WILL there is a way.  Find the energy..and force yourself to contact the advisors TODAY.

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    • Posted

      I emailed my advisor and should be meeting up with her soon. Hopefully she and I can talk out my options and find what's best for me because I also don't want to regret changing my major. I pobably won't be able to change my schedule now since I'm far into the semester and would end up REALLY behind in my classes. I'll just have to stick with it till the end of the semester. Thank you smile
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  • Posted

    Hi there. I was in a very similar place a number of years ago. Not having been able to get into studying my first chice of subject, I went into computer science and hated it. I left after a month, but it was too late to get into anything else because back then all courses started in September/October. It's completely different now - so many more courses and can also start at different times in the year with some. Anyway, I took a gap year+, volunteered, got some some basic working experience, built up my soft skills and really thought about my desires. I applied for something that was related to my first choice of subject (that I had been unsuccessful in), but it was only a diploma course. However, the main thing was I was INTERESTED. After a year on the course, there was a chance to switch over to the degree version. As I had achieved the required grades, it was possible and the rest is history! I What I'm saying is there are all sorts of different ways to get ahead, and to never be put off because no one else is doing it that way. You come out so much richer with the experience, able to handle life better and not scared or setbacks which are part of the road to success. I've also heard that nowadays many people change jobs/careers a number of times in their lifetimes (14 in one article!) Older parents may not always understand this, but as we grow with life, our mindsets/passions can change. I've even known people in their 40s and 50s who have been undecided and then ended up in real good careers. The trick is to hang in there and be patient with life, trying your best every day to improve in whatever way you can - life will end up rewarding you and the whole experience can end up being very sweet in the end though impossible to imagine now. You show loads of potential - don't let the negativity of life ever get you down because it's just never worth it. I wish you all the very best my friend. 
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    • Posted

      It made me feel a little better that I'm not the only that has gone through this. I really want to find something that I'll love doing and make enough money to live a decent life. I'll try my best to find that. I know it may not come right away, but I'll find it somehow. And part of this is having to believe in myself because I sometimes have problems with that too, but I'll work on it and hopefully everything works out for me. Thanks smile
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    • Posted

      Great positive attitude to have Mary! Write that down somewhere and get it out whenever you need a reminder of how positive your resolve can be. I'm 48 and facing a crossroads in my career choice. I'm going to concentrate on doing something that i LOVE and motivates me to get up in the morning rather than just something that pays the bills. It sounds obvious but most people can learn to live comfortably on a steady income but it's the luxuries they think they need that mount up and can put pressure on your finances. Learn to live within your means and it will take a lot of pressure off you throughout your life.

      Good luck! Big hug. I have a good feeling about you realising your dreams :-)

      Digsby x

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