I'm confused

Posted , 3 users are following.

I met a guy online a month ago. He works away and we chatted Quite a often. About a lot of things and some sexy as well. We are both in mid to late 30's and looking to settle down after many years of being single and playing the field so to speak. We are very attracted to each other physically and intellectually and both keen to meet and see where it may lead. Until one day, 4 days before we were due to meet he goes quiet. I wrote it off as another douchebag but he's now come back 2 wks later to apologise and tell me the reason for that was he had found out he had HSV2 and is extremely upset. No doubt you wouldn't be. My understanding of this is you either had to have sex with someone to get it I. That time frame or you already had it? Am I right? And also, why would he tell me this info if we hadn't already met. This is such a new situation and I don't want to judge or jump to conclusions as I don't know enough about this. Do I still meet him, I mean it he gets a cold sore it was gross me out but it's not a deal breaker !!!!! HELP 😕

1 like, 6 replies

6 Replies

  • Posted

    He could have had it before, maybe even from a long time ago, but only tested for it recently, for whatever reason.

    Telling you could be viewed as a good thing. If he is genuinely going through this diagnosis at the moment, then it's great that he shared such sensitive information with you. You should find out more details and go with your gut instincts.

    Anyway, there's loads of info online regarding HSV-2 and transmission risks/prevention, including via Patient Info and my pinned discussion thread at the top of this GH forum. smile

    • Posted

      Thank you Felis,  I guess its a admirable thing to be honest. Poor guy, im just not sure if i should do anything at this point. Perhaps let him deal with it and see what happens, if he initiates a dinner and discuss it futher should we want to continue seeing each other. I guess when it comes to a relatinship sex is a big part of it but companionship also important.   
    • Posted

      At least he was honest. Meet him and see if there is a chemistry. If nothing else you can be his friend and be supportive. I'm sure he really needs that right now. I'm going through this now. I'm not even diagnosed but the mental anguish has been enough to put me in a funny farm. I'm not kidding. I'm seeing a shrink now because I don't know what I was thinking. Better to be with an honest guy then fall in love with someone who isn't and you end up getting something anyways. This is a scary thing. If I come out clean after all of this I will die of shock. There is something definitely going on with me and no one can figure it out!!! sad
    • Posted

      oh man, sorry to hear that. at least you have identified an issue and exhausting possibilities instead of ignoring it which is why this virus is now wide spread and so many people or suffering. And you are right, at least he has been honest about it. When you are my age and looking for a life companion its a great trait to have and would appear to be cabable of a trusting relationship should it develope into something. I guess i'll put it out there, that although its a concern its not as scary as first appears and having a trusting honest partner in this day and age is more desirable then one who is not.  Oh man, sometimes i wish i could just get him out of my head but i can not.... Am i just being stupid! thanks for responding - it means a lot as i dont want to speak with my friends about this 

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