I'm in a breakdown :'' (

Many of us have damaged childhoods which affect who we become in our adult life,  the secret is to deal with it and find a way to move on with your life anyway.   Have you thought your father may feel guilty because he can't help you?   Or he has his own problems to deal with too?   He is only human you know and not perfect. 

If he doesn't understand then stop telling him - it's that simple.  You need to talk to people who do understand like us on here and your doctor/counsellor.   So seek these people out and they will be able to help you.  

My parents never understood my depression so I never talked to them about it as it made me feel bad when I tried and they clearly didn't understand.  You don't need to make yourself feel worse do you?   See your doctor or if you are still at school see the school counsellor.    You need to take steps to make yourself feel better.  And stay away from your 'enemies' as much as you can.   Who needs that s...t?

Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem isn't it?   So please don't go there.   You have nothing to lose by seeking help after all do you?   Do it please.  x

Pain and depression never really goes away but you can learn how to deal with it and how to live with it. In order to do so, you must not fight it. Allow yourself days of self-wallowing if need be, but be kind to yourself. There is no need for self-punishment as others seem to already have fulfilled that role.

Don't be afraid of being angry either. Anger, as well as sadness, are energies. Energies need to be chanelled.

Try something creative. Paint, write, work with clay or wood but only do so without judging yourself and don't let anyone else judge unless you are sure you can take critisicm - good as well as bad.

You'll be amazed how calm you'll soon be feeling.

There's a book called 'The Artist's Way' in which she 'prescribes' to have pen and paper ready first thing in the morning. Before you do anything else - even going to the loo - you write whatever comes into your head. This could be as simple as 'sh*t sh*t sh*t sh*t' or 'tonight I dreamt...' There need be no meaning to what you write as this is just a way of emptying yourself of negativity that has gathered throughout the previous day. Once you've finished your page, put it away. You don't ever hav to look at it again and noone else need to see it. The job is done for this morning.

I strongly recommend this.

I also recommend hypnotherapy to discover what actually started these feelings. We might think we know, but the answers we ourselves come up with are usually only tapering over the real reasons.

Good luck young friend

Life can really be hard on our mind and souls. We will all urge you to seek medical intervention which I hope you will do today. In addition my view is that you have great inner strength to come this far so it's important you recognise you have the power within you to keep going. Suffering can be so exhausting we lose focus on the world around us. I found praying helped me so much. If i didnt have my faith that God was listening to my pleas I don't know how I would have got through my darkest months. This illness has made me understand suffering and the devastation it has on us.

Please seek help today you need to pick up that phone now!! You have the strength.

Keep the faith I know it can seem hard when you feel so removed from everyone and everything.

God loves you and will help you but you have also got to pick up that phone and get medical intervention Xxx

Blessings and hugs to you xx

Thanks for all your lovely replies  

But i personally feel like i've grown up too quick... like i have missed an aspect of my life... but today i was thinking about my life and i thought... everytime i seem to be happy is when i think about freedom, Doing the things i have been longing to do. And also my dog died last year who grew up within our family since 2004, my brother took the dog with him fishing and when he was under a bridge fishing he heard a big bang and when he went to investigated the noise he found the dog dead in the middle of the road, he got hit straight in the head by a passing car and nothing could of prevented it. It was a terrible way to go and he was the only bit of company i had when i went downstairs at night when i was alone... since then i have started writing my own journel about the thoughts i say in my head... and i have done a good job on it. Maybe feeling depressed is a part of growing up... but ''Every dog has it's day''