I'm nothing.

Posted , 4 users are following.

I feel like nothing is real, I feel life is just an illusion, my mother blames me for bring a laptop and leaving it at school, now she scolds me, my friend is trying to commit suicide, I cannot handle any burden anymore, I should tie a noose, and make it quick.

I feel no love to my parents, I'm forced to go to school even though am sick, I'm restricted to almost every social contacts, my parents doesn't love me, I don't see their love, I only feel their knives pointing at me, when I turned my back, I feel that when I asked my father or mother, they are mad.

I haven't cut my skin yet, I only see nerves of hate going through me, I only have 2 friends, yet others was just fake, I became nothing, no one cares, no one loves me, my mother has more love being given to my brother, and to my other cousins as well, but once my mother go front of me, her smile becames the bolt of pain that will surround me, I became limited, instead of becoming the unlimited millenial.

I'm still a student, in the grade 8, people are calling me weird, except for my two friends appreciating my intelligience, but I just show my fakest smile, fakest joy, I only sense hate, my mother stripped me off, now I'm just using a laptop that she gave me only once, she limits me over the media, where all informations are there.

I feel this, reaching my neck to strangle, I just let it be, while my parents are gone, I tried to commit suicide, secretly, by using my own made ropes from old wires.

I'm nothing, no one really needs to see this, only people who cares.

I'm happy to be nothing.

2 likes, 4 replies

Report / Delete

4 Replies

  • Posted

    Hi Retropia

    We note from a recent post which you have made to our forum that you may be experiencing thoughts around self-harm. If we have misinterpreted your comments then we apologies for contacting you directly. But if you are having such thoughts then please note that you are not alone in this, and there are people out there that can help.

    If you are having these suicidal thoughts then we strongly recommend you speak to someone who may be able to help. The Samaritans offer a safe space where you can talk openly about what you are going through. They can help you explore your options, understand your problems better, or just be there to listen.

    Their contact details are on our patient information leaflet here: https://patient.info/health/dealing-with-suicidal-thoughts, which also offers lots of other advice on how you can access the help you may need.

    If you are having such thoughts then please do reach out to the team at the Samaritans (or the other people detailed in our leaflet) who will understand what you're going through and will be able to help.

    Kindest regards


    Report / Delete Reply
  • Posted

    Hi Retropia - I'm sorry to read of your situation. I understand how powerless and worthless you feel. I am wondering whether there may be a Counsellor you can see at school? Or a favorite teacher, perhaps? The important thing here is that you let a responsible adult know what is happening with you, how you are feeling. They will be able to assist in getting the help you need. You might also want to keep a journal about what is happening, describe what has happened, how you feel, what you want to do about it. This journal can help pinpoint any triggers, situations or interactions that exacerbate your depression. Start finding help today.

    Report / Delete Reply

Join this discussion or start a new one?

New discussion Reply

Report or request deletion

Thanks for your help!

We want the forums to be a useful resource for our users but it is important to remember that the forums are not moderated or reviewed by doctors and so you should not rely on opinions or advice given by other users in respect of any healthcare matters. Always speak to your doctor before acting and in cases of emergency seek appropriate medical assistance immediately. Use of the forums is subject to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy and steps will be taken to remove posts identified as being in breach of those terms.

newnav-down newnav-up