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I'm really struggling

Posted , 2 users are following.

killerkid700
killerkid700

Guys, I can't cope anymore...

I'm 16, I've had clinical depression for 5 years and its just getting worse.

About a month ago my girlfriend finished with me and I tried to OD, ended up in hospital. Got put on a mental ward for two weeks, got out and tried to OD again... Back to hospital. Won't send me back to a mental ward because it made me worse...

Past few days I've been really down

I haven't slept all week

I haven't eaten for two days

I haven't taken my meds for two days

I haven't even left my bed for two days

Yesterday I cut myself about 1,000 times and today I've already cut about 500 times

All I can think about is killing myself

I keep thinking about going to the woods and hanging myself

I want to cut off my left ring finger

I want to die so badly

I'm really struggling to cope, all my friends have left, my family keeps pushing me away

My father kicked me out, my mother kicked me out, I'm staying with my grandfather, but he's really ill and he's probably going to die soon

I don't know how to cope anymore, I just want to end it all... Even my therapist Haas pushed me away. No one wants me around

I just want to die

1 like, 7 replies

7 Replies

  • manda08392
    manda08392 killerkid700

    Posted

    Please don't cut yourself any more today. Where do you live? Surely there is a resource you can reach out to for immediate help today- emergency visit with your therapist, suicide hotline, support groups. I would like to help you find a resource, I just don't know where you are.

    You have had a lot happen and are having difficulty coping, your feelings are normal but the world doesn't want you to die, it wants you to get help.

    • killerkid700
      killerkid700 manda08392

      Posted

      I've tried everything

      Everyone keeps turning me away

      I live in Swansea

      I've cut about 400 times more since writing the first post and I'm still cutting

      I really can't cope

      I'm sorry

  • manda08392
    manda08392 killerkid700

    Posted

    Your tone doesn't leave me a lot of time for research so I must insist that you contact Swansea Crisis Resolution team.

    I had a post with the email and multiple numbers but since that is being moderated for some reason then I need you to call this number:

    9am - 9pm every day. 01792 618838 01792 618836

    Outside these hours please ring:

    Cefn Coed Hospital: 01792 561155

    • killerkid700
      killerkid700 manda08392

      Posted

      I've dealt with them enough, they don't seem to help

      Last time I did they gave me an urgent referral to therapy but nothings come of it. I've told my therapist multiple times that I'm suicidal and that I want to die, but there's nothing they do.

      I'm so thankful that you've tried to help but I don't think things are going to get better for me. I'm sorry to have bothered you

    • manda08392
      manda08392 killerkid700

      Posted

      You are not bothering me, you are worrying me.

      Call them again, get a referral to a better therapist, at least have someone to talk to. Keep trying until you get that right person that makes you feel better, life is worth living!

    • manda08392
      manda08392 killerkid700

      Posted

      You have to have faith.

      I mean, it can only go up from here, right?

      I'm praying for you.

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