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I'm so scared I will kill myself

Posted , 5 users are following.

chloe97631
chloe97631

I am 25 years old and have suffered with severe depression and anxiety for 2 years. It all started when I became ill 2 years ago and the drs couldnt tell me what was wrong. I went through so many tests and lost alot of weight. Finally after months I was told I have functional dyspepsia. And i started to feel better. I still had depression and the anxiety but the dr put me on medication and it was working.

Then last year I was sexually assaulted by a man at work when away on a work trip. Which made me angry and moody. My depression got worse and i put alot of weight on which again made me worse. I was able to get on with life and although i was never fully happy i was ok.

Then this year my grandma died and my dad went downhill and hes been losing his temper and made home unbareable. Then a few days before my birthday i got a water infection - which are one of the things i cant deal with well - and I got really down about it. Then my functional dyspepsia flared up again, which has sent me spiraling downhill and i want to die. So much i dont trust myself. I cry all the time and i feel so frustrated that i cant just click my fingers and die.

I have been looking at ways to do it but i just dont know which is the best so i dont feel pain.

I have a therapy appointment on tuesday but i dont know how much longer i can stay here.

1 like, 5 replies

5 Replies

  • tess33005
    tess33005 chloe97631

    Posted

    Chloe, you stay right here until your appointment. That is an order!!!!

    We will help you to feel better. You've had a terrible time lately and I'm not surprised you're considering suicide.

    But we don't want you to kill yourself, that's for sure.

    One and a half days to go, then you see the therapist. Be VERY strong and wait out that one and a half days. PM if you need any more help. Lots of love  from Tess

    • chloe97631
      chloe97631 tess33005

      Posted

      Thank you for replying.

      I am trying to be strong. Everything is such a struggle.

      I cant wait to see the therapist.

      I just want to be myself again 😔

  • lillie46665
    lillie46665 chloe97631

    Posted

    Hi Chloe

    You really have been through the mill

    Go to your therapy appointment and get the help you need and deserve.

    Take Care

    Lil

    • chloe97631
      chloe97631 lillie46665

      Posted

      Thank you.

      I am going to try and be strong and see what the therapist says.

      Just wish this would all go away

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