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So for the last couple of days I feel completely lost, sad and feel like there is no exit anymore. I feel like I do not want to live anymore and at the same time I do not want to die. I feel like I'm in my dreams and that this is not real and that one day I will wake up and everything is going to be good again. I feel like my whole body is just falling apart, but deep inside it is still fighting to the last second. I'm dizzy, I have depersonalization, tingling sensations in my head and chest... My vision feels weird, not real... noisy and the floaters are bothering so much that I do not want to go outside anymore (I still go because I know I have to).There are not so many of them, but I can stop focusing on them.... I am short of breath all the time for like 7 months now... This is just disaster. I want to cry soo much, but for some reason I just can't and the feeling is even worse. I am fighting every day as much as I can... Sometimes I feel a bit better mentally (rarely physically), but it feels like I will never ever going to experience real "life" again. I feels like I have nothing left.
If you have antything to motivate me again, I would really appreciate it.
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