I think I'm depressed but I'm embarrassed and scared.... Advice???

Posted , 4 users are following.

So I feel kind of lame and stupid, but i think i might be depressed.

The thing is, I have a good life-----and i'm very grateful for that, but i just don't understand why i feel like life is so pointless all the time? Like i'm not bullied in school (I'm16 years old) and i love my family but i honestly see no point in living. I have thought about dying before and i usually cry myself to sleep. I feel like my family will judge me so much and think i'm pathetic for feeling like this. The thing is sometimes i do say, "well who cares we all die in the end" to my siblings and they usually say "then just die already." Sometimes i wanna die,  but i'm scared---- i'm too scared to do it cause i do wanna live but i just find living pointless. I don't have the courage to kill myself and i don't have the courage to change cause i try so so so so hard to be more positive and try not to think about how much i hate myslef and living but its so hard! And what makes me hate myself more is that i have a good, good life so why am i so sad all the time? Why can't i be happy and normal? Why can't i understand these feelings and sometimes my heart just hurts and my eyes sting so much and i just feel like its all pointless but i'm just scared.... and i don't know what to do..

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  • Posted

    Ok so one think I've learnt through my drpression is that it has no prejudice. You can be a tramp or a hollywood star, there is no pattern.

    I work in medicine and the other thing I would point out is that you're 16. Now this makes your post no less valuable but you must accept that your hormones will be making your moods naturally very irratic.

    Some people have a happy disposition and some sad, I wish I was the former myself! It's your life and you should do what you want and I respect that. However, at least give your body and mind a few more years to develope to avoid any brash decisions. At least then, as I'm sure many people will agree, when you truly are depressed, you're painfullt certain of it!

    At low moments I try and think what the most significant contribution I can make to society is, you're young and have a long time to get this right. The most important thing is that you don't do anyting silly before you've given yourself the option to live.

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  • Posted

    First thing first you aren't lame or stupid. Most people cant admit they are depressed or even begin to think they are depressed. There are a number of form you can fill in on this sight that will tell you how depressed you are

    Assessing newly diagnosed patients

    These tools include:

    Patient Health Questionnaire (PHQ-9):

    https://patient.info/doctor/patient-health-questionnaire-phq-9

    this is a nine-item questionnaire which helps both to diagnose depression and to assess severity. It is based directly on the diagnostic criteria for major depressive disorder in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual - Fourth Edition (DSM-IV). It takes about three minutes to complete. Scores are categorised as minimal (1-4), mild (5-9) , moderate (10-14), moderately severe (15-19) and severe depression (20-27). It can be downloaded free from the internet.

    Hospital Anxiety and Depression (HAD) Scale: despite its name, this has been validated for use in primary care. It is designed to assess both anxiety and depression. It takes about five minutes to complete. The anxiety and depression scales each have seven questions, and scores are categorised as normal (0-7), mild (8-10), moderate (11-14) and severe (15-21).[9] 

    Beck Depression Inventory® - Second Edition (BDI-II): this also uses DSM criteria. it takes about five minutes to complete. It is an assessment of the severity of depression and is graded as minimal (0-13), mild (14-19), moderate (20-28) and severe (29-36). It consists of 21 items to assess the intensity of depression in clinical and normal patients. Each item is a list of four statements arranged in increasing severity about a particular symptom of depression. It is also not free but can be purchased from the supplier's website.

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  • Posted

    Hello there, you're 16 and chemicals and what not, emotons are swarming you, i suggest you ask a parent to attend with you to a drs appointment, you're not pathetic kid, you are a human being trying to grow up, you have to believe in yourself, depression needs to find a route ause as to why you've started to feel this way, have a think about it and keep a journal, pen and paper of each day, good and bad, note if anything particularly set you off on dark thoughts, but first you need a relaxtion technique ok? When you start into panic mode try to think about anouther subject make your mind recall all about that subject you can until your anxiery passes/ lessens and you are focused, please book an apoointment with your gp and share your info collected with him. Chin up now, Nick.
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  • Posted

    One thing that stuck out to me in your post, you said you don't have the courage for change, but you are reaching out for help on this forum. That is courage smile
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