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I think im depressed

Posted , 3 users are following.

vicky84445
vicky84445

hi everyone,

ive posted on here before as i have been suffering with anxiety for some time now, a couple of weeks ago it got pretty bad again i lost my appetite and i felt pretty bad i couldnt go to work for a bit and i felt quite low, it went away after a week or two and i felt ok, my appetite was good at least. But for the past week or so it has come back again. Only this time i feel majorly down, my one supportive person has completely disowned me now he says i can talk to him when ive got over myself that its all in my head and im just looking for something to be wrong. 

I cant even get myself out of my room because im so frightened of my anxiety and i feel like i just want to end everything, my head feels so weird a headache but i feel like im totally losing my mind like im going to rip my hair out. I feel so sick and nauseated. I hate even talking to people, not even my mum when she asks if im ok, i just want her to leave me alone, ive turned in to a total recluse. When i went to the doctor last time my propranolol got moved up from 10mg three times a day to 20mg three times a day. To be perfectly honest i dont feel like its really been working for a while now. Please im afraid im going to do something stupid, theres no way out because im so scared to go to the doctor. Im only twenty please i just want to die.

2 likes, 10 replies

10 Replies

  • vicky84445
    vicky84445

    Posted

    I cant even leave my bedroom to make a cup of tea im that stressed
  • gwen1953
    gwen1953 vicky84445

    Posted

    Hi Vicky,

    Do you get times when you are high as well? If so what are you like then?  I suffer from Bipolar Disorder which means I need medication to keep me on the level. I was given Propanalol some years ago now but it didn't work for me. Not all things suit all people.  Try and find the courage to go to the Doctor.  Perhaps your mum will go with you but you have to be honest with her if you haven't been already and explain whats going on.  Ask your doctor if he would consider giving you Lithium it's one of the oldest drugs around and works for a lot of people. It certainly worked for me and if you have an understanding Doctor it's worth a try. I had to try 5 different drugs before they found one that suited me and there is nothing wrong with saying that Propanolol doesn't help you. It's the Doctors job to find something that does. Please don't do anything silly. Life's too short and with the right medication things WILL get bet better.

    • vicky84445
      vicky84445 gwen1953

      Posted

      Hi thank you for the reply positive words from complete strangers seem to help alot more than people think ha. Im in at the doctors today so i have to try not to totally freak out and not go because its the only way im going to feel better about this. I just hope its not the doctor that just trys to give me a leaflet for counciling and just doesnt really listen. I will ask about the bi polar thing because that does sound similair to what i have a depressive episode tends to last a couple of weeks then i will feel ok for a bit normally a couple of months. But my last episode was only two weeks ago.
    • vicky84445
      vicky84445 anne240

      Posted

      Hi been to the doctor last night.....he gave me 50mg of sertraline to be taken daily....im also being weened off of the propranolol....i am quite nervous about taking these as i hate having to deal with side effects and things mainly ones such as suicidal thoughts and increased anxiety which i dont know if i could cope with but I've gone for it just taken my second one but don't want to say to much yet but i dont feel ready to go anywhere yet.
    • anne240
      anne240 vicky84445

      Posted

      Hello Vicky.  I am glad you have seen a doctor.  I know that we can feel nervous when taking a new anti depressant.  It does take a while for us to feel better, and often we do feel worse before the medication takes effect.  I do hope the Sertraline helps.  I was on it for years and did well on it. 

      Hope things get better.  Let us know how you are doing.

    • vicky84445
      vicky84445 anne240

      Posted

      Hi ive currently got another thread going as I'm on day 2 of sertraline and ive had a mega surge of panic attacks everytime i wake up or even shut my eyes......im currently so dizzy and uncoordinated that i can barely walk downstairs i had to get back in bed because i keep feeling like I'm going to faint.....Did you get anything like that???

      Xx

    • anne240
      anne240 vicky84445

      Posted

      You seem to be experiencing side effects from the Sertraline, and hopefully they will settle down.  I have been on lots of different anti depressants in the 20 years I have had depression.  Some gave me bad side effects and I had to stop them.  What suits one person may not suit another. 

      I don't remember feeling like you do on Sertraline, but oh Prozac, well that is another story!!!  Worse one for me and had to stop after giving it a try for a few weeks.

      If you carry on feeling like you do, then perhaps Sertraline just does not agree with you.  Those things you are experiencing do not sound good at all.  I think I have read here of someone else who took it for a few days and felt really poorly.  All anti depressants do have side effects, but the last one I was on, after the Sertraline had minimal side effects and I was on it for 9 years. 

      I know you said you did not want to go back to your doctor, but don't you think you should tell them how the anti depressant is making you feel?  You are so young, and need to find something that relieves how you are feeling.

      Take care please and keep in touch as I am worrying about you.

      I think it is a matter of finding the medication that suits you as an individual. 

  • edward66288
    edward66288 vicky84445

    Posted

    Hi Vicky sorry to hear about how you are feeling, I too am in the same boat and have been majorly down these past few weeks. The quick answer to your questions are to seek professional help from a doctor, tell him exactly how you feel and be completely honest on what thoughts you are having it might seem embarrassing but I can assure nothing you can say hasn't been heard before which is the complete truth of it all. I find speaking to people to be a great help especially ones that are close to me which is mainly my brother! It may be hard but you need to get out there, go for a walk and gets some fresh air that always helps me, even if I have an anxiety attack then at least I can say I've tried but I suppose it's easy for me to say this now but at the time of a panic attack there is nothing like it but there are a lot of us suffering the same as you are so never believe your alone because that's really not true at all! I hope that you start feeling a bit better soon and Remember just try to push yourself a bit to get back our there! X
    • anne240
      anne240 edward66288

      Posted

      You sound such a kind person giving Vicky advice when you yourself are feeling so down.  I find people here so nice and supportive, and it warms my heart that people here help strangers because they know exactly how they are feeling.

      No we are never alone when we come here and let these lovely people like you into our sitting rooms.  Makes me feel so much less alone.

      Take care and hope you feel brighter soon. 

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