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I thought I could do it but I cant.

Posted , 9 users are following.

jesse18393
jesse18393

Hey guys I was on here maybe a couple months ago talking about my depression. I thought If I just stopped thinking about it and ignored it I would maybe feel different so I got off this site and just stopped participating in talking about my problems. I need help. I don't know what to do NOTHING is helping me I cry so damn much every single day and I'm not here. I tell my mom that I want to go to the doctor but I know if I tell her why she will tell me I'm being dumb and I'm fine. I didn't want to even wake up this morning I wish I could sleep forever so I don't have to feel this way. I feel dizzy and nauseous all the time. I just got a new job I thought would help me but I'm not mentally there either I just am so out of place here in this world. I feel like I'm not even me I'm not here my mind is so full of thoughts and then My soul feels gone. I'm completely out of it. I'm wasting my life. I am a waste. I make people happy (boyfriend, family) but then I don't feel the same as them at all I am numb. I get sad yes but I don't have any feelings anymore just thoughts. Body is in auto pilot. I don't know what's going on and I don't know what to do. Someone please help me. Any responses at all would be amazing. Thanks guys.

6 likes, 19 replies

19 Replies

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  • leigh21505
    leigh21505 jesse18393

    Posted

    Hi jesse18393 i will try to give some advise i would go to your Gp if you feel this bad. I have felt like this there is help out there. With depression you need some time to get back on track. It can be daunting to seek help. If your mum doesnt understand speak to a doctor he or she will understand and give you advise on how to get through this. Depression really in my opinion needs to be treated.
    • jesse18393
      jesse18393 leigh21505

      Posted

      Thankyou so much. I will try my hardest to get to a doctor thankyou for the help it means so much Xo
    • leigh21505
      leigh21505 jesse18393

      Posted

      Thats ok your not alone with this. The doctors are fantastic in my opinion with depression. There are many soultions to treat depression. I wish you well in you recovery.
  • hypercat
    hypercat jesse18393

    Posted

    Hi I agree you need to see a doctor.  As long as you are legally an adult you don't have to tell anyone your business if you don't want to and that includes your mother.  It would obviously be better if she could give you some support but it doesn't always happen with families.  Do you have any other family or friends you can talk to?   I think counselling would help you.  x

     

    • jesse18393
      jesse18393 hypercat

      Posted

      I talk to my boyfriend and that is it. He lets me cry everyday with him and he doesn't complain at all, he's just upset he can't help me. I feel like talking about it doesn't even help anymore

    • leigh21505
      leigh21505 jesse18393

      Posted

      I had the life knocked out of me once I lost myself for a while there was no soul in my being but with the right help and support you will get through this.
    • leigh21505
      leigh21505 jesse18393

      Posted

      Thats ok i wish you well. Good luck for the future your soul and being will return mine did and yours will too.
  • borderriever
    borderriever jesse18393

    Posted

    tHello

    Can you explain why you feel the way you do, depression generally is caused by some outside sources, or even family matters.?

    I understand you were to go and see your GP did He give you medications or any other treatment plans.?

    You say you are a waste, why do you feel that way ? We we should never do ourselves down, your boyfriends family seem to like you so that should boost your mood, explain what is wrong

    • jesse18393
      jesse18393 borderriever

      Posted

      I don't know. I guess it started with my last relationship about two years ago. It destroyed me as a person basically and I have not been the same. Idk how one horrible person could just destroy my being. I havent been to a doctor ever for this. I'm a waste because my life is so amazing and anyone would be lucky to have my family and my friends and boyfriend, but I'm not even fully here to enjoy it. I'm wasting it. Im just not happy and I feel I never will be

    • leigh21505
      leigh21505 jesse18393

      Posted

      Yeah if i was you i would go to the doctors they may put you on medication so you can establish your feelings and thoughts and embrace life once again.
    • jesse18393
      jesse18393 leigh21505

      Posted

      I really hope so. I also hope I have enough money if that does happen
  • borderriever
    borderriever jesse18393

    Posted

    Jessie you need to move on now if it has been two years since your last relationship ended you need to start again. You have a good family with a boyfriend who seems to think the world of you, most important of all a couple of possible inlaws who seem to liike you as well

    Sometimes first relationships can become very destructive when they break up and this can be a real problem to move on from

    My first serious relationship lasted for three years and was destroyed by my family. I did not go out with anyone for upwards of three years and preferred to take variouse courses for work and Partime Youth work, it was a problem although I eventually fought through the negativity and I started slowly to extend my circle of friends. Yes I still thought of my loss, although I had other things to consider until I found someone else that had my interests. 

    You find eventually you will find someone and this person was right, and it is not a good thing to compare your serious partner with those you left behind. It is hoped whn you reach this point you will find someone that is great to be with. You have grieved what you have left and now you celebrate now what you have.

    Talk to your GP and see what can be done for your negative mood. It is important not to dwell on the past, look forward to the future

    You have had a hard teacher now you enter life with someone who thinks you are right for him. Do not kick him in the head, enjoy your life and learn together

    • jesse18393
      jesse18393 borderriever

      Posted

      I might have explained that wrong. It's just like I'm completely over him and have no feeling towards him he's not relevant in my life anymore. Its just going through that whole thing I guess I got used to being depressed. He/the thought of him left and the depression stayed. I just think that's what started it. I love my boyfriend now and hes truly the one I'm going to marry I feel. I'm just not all the way there. Having this life i should be so much happier but I'm just not happy and I'm sad all the time. Also the smallest things set me off and I just cry. I dony know what to do

    • borderriever
      borderriever jesse18393

      Posted

      In my case I looked up my old fiance on Facebook to see if she was still around, I found her she had returned to Her Island Home and was living in the old family home.

      The ironic thing was this was less than two years ago, I am in my sixties, married in a nice bungalow in the country with a lovelly wife and collie.

      That relationship died about forty years ago. We all think what if, that may never go away. It was nice to see Her photograph, She never changed and had remained single.

      Personally I have no idea why I did it, it was an off the cuff thing. A relationship there would never work. we move on.

      Live your life pet what has gone is gone, Look whose talking lol.

      Love your man , hopefully He will always love you enjoy your life together.

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