I've been agrophobic for 20 years and dealt with anxiety panicking and now menuapause

Posted , 14 users are following.

I've got 2 disabled sons who are adults but need me so much and the menuapause is making me not function as I should and added to that I have a partner who drinks constantly and scares me into panic.... Any advice please I just can't talk to anyone as he watches my every move so I have no one ....

1 like, 42 replies

42 Replies

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  • Posted

    Also I left my partner once and my life changed I felt free but he hunted me down and scares me into going back with him ....sorry this is still Rachel talking
  • Posted

    I don't know Rachel, I've never been in that situation. Menopause is bad, but having a partner like that must be absolutely horrible. Somehow you have to get away from him. Hopefully someone on here can advise you better, but my heart goes out to you.

  • Posted

    Rachel I am so sorry to hear about your life with your husband. I know it is very hard to leave a guy like that...I've been through it many years ago now and my daughter just finally left her abuser of 8 years a few months ago.

    Can I ask how he scares you into going back to him? I know they all have thier tactics...they know what gets us most and they use it...but most times it is a whole lot of talk. They don't typically break any laws that would land them in jail...put it that way.

    Have you ever called the police on him? If so, what happened? Did he somehow convince you to not press charges?

    Just trying to get a feel for where you are at so we can hopefully help you get stronger. You definitely don't deserve that treatment.

    • Posted

      I can’t leave my disabled sons they are my world so I came home as they are the most important things in my life and he threatened to kill him self and I can’t carry that burden I just can’t xx
  • Posted

    I am very sorry to hear that. If you have financially independent of him and can survive there must because way to move away from him. You might be better without his drinking and threatenning you. Menapause causes enough anxiety as it. All the best. Take GOOD care
    • Posted

      No I’m not dependent on him I support him with money so there’s no problem there xx
    • Posted

      But I’m agrophobic so can’t move away else I would in a instant so he can’t find me xx
    • Posted

      I am so sorry to hear your story. A horrible man does not deserve you live with. I left my one 11 years ago, my life is much better. Treat yourself nicely, you may need social worker to help you and bring your sons with you. 
  • Posted

    Is there anyway you can get out of the relationship?
    • Posted

      I’ve tried and tried so hard but he knows I’m limited as being agrophobic I can’t get far and I don’t want to leave my home and my sons but he just won’t leave ... it’s not just me that goes through it they do as well my heart breaks xx
  • Posted

    I have had panic attacks and agoraphobia for 11 years.... I guess it started with the onset of Peri but I had no clue at the time .  Since I’ve been using the estrogen patch it has got so much better. See your doctor and ask her if you can go on it .

    So sorry you are going through so much ... you’re not alone I’m going through hell too and when your freedom is taken away from you with agoraphobia it’s just awful .

    Hang in there !! 

    • Posted

      I’ve just started hrt so fingers crossed it makes me stronger xx
    • Posted

      The HRT will not get you away from an abusive situation. You will need help from your brothers and the police for that. Your husband abuses you because he is a weak man. Put him up against your brothers and there will be no fight...beleive me. He will run with his ugly little tail between his legs. Men like that dont usually stand up to other men. They only abuse the vulnerable. Once he realizes that you have had enough and you have your brothers and the police standing behind you he won't have any fight in him.

    • Posted

      Put it this way...a man who does not work...who lives off a woman...and who has a problem with alcohol has no self worth. He is weak and he knows it. He takes out his own vulnerabilities on you because he has probably managed to gaslight you and make you think you need him. Once a man like that is put in his place they are finished. Stay strong...let your brothers know. Call the police everytime he threatens you in any way and he will leave sooner than you think to find someone elsebwho will put up with his crap since you no longer will. Those types of men are very simple minded.
    • Posted

      Yes it will ease some of the symptoms ... I’ve only been on it a month and although you find relief within a few days it takes about 3 months I’ve read to really kick in . It completely takes away hot flashes and night sweats which didn’t bother me too much anyway  ... the fatigue and depression is the worst part for me . 

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