I've been on anti depressants for 6 years.

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I thought they were working and I was doing well. However a few days ago I had a bad anxiety attack that just wouldn't go, to the point that I collapsed and was taken to hospital. I have been prescribed propranalol for the physical symptoms and increased my anti depressants. I find it so hard to understand why this has happened and I'm so scared I will never recover. I'm trying so hard to be positive but the negative thoughts seems to keep winning. I keep crying and I'm really struggling to cope with everyday life. I just want to feel better and be a good mum to my kids. Any advice would be great, I'm desperate, I can't go on like this.

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  • Posted

    Mother’s who express worry about being good mums tend to be the best because as they are concerned about it they make effort in that direction.  Their children sense the love and caring. Remember you don’t have to be a perfect mum, just good enough. 

    Somtimes we we fight the negative thoughts so intensely that it wears us out. Try not fighting them but just accepting that they are there and knowing that they are just thoughts and not behavior or actions. The acceptance of them can work to take away the power they have over you.

     

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    • Posted

      Thank you, I just wish I could stop feeling that I will never get better. I feel I am hurting my children and not doing enough. Sometimes I am scared to try. I worry my medication won’t work and I will never get better. Sometimes I just sit in a corner alone with my thoughts not capable of anything. I want to wake up one day feeling like a new person. Everyone keeps telling me that it will get better but I don’t believe them and I frighten myself that i’ll be like this forever. I honestly think I’m not trying hard enough and everyone would be better off without me. I love my children so much and want so much to change. I am so desperate.
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  • Posted

    Hey sarah..im a mum of 3 and i have had depression/anxiety on and off for 15 years...im only 38 lol im just coming out of one of my worst episodes...there are always better days...always....you have to hold on tight and remind yourself that you have gotten through all this before and will do again...since ive upped my dose of antidepressants im slowly getting better...your kids need you and so does everybody else in your life...i honestly was at my lowest...my partner decided to leave me in the midst of it 2 weeks ago...but you know what??? Its my life and i choose to accept that thos illness will always be part of me but it is NOT who i am....ive spent years fighting it but now by acceptong it i can slowly begin to love myself more which in turn will make myself and the kids much more happier....YOU CAN DO THIS!!! xxx
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    • Posted

      Thankyou, did it ever make you feel like you couldn’t look after your kids? I’m in a trance most of the time and they are looking after me right now. I can’t stop thinking about how I feel and the damage i’m doing to all those around me. I have small periods of time where I can do a few things but it’s short lived. I try to tell myself that each day is a day closer to getting better but it doesn’t make any difference. I’m on a huge amount of drugs and I’m so scared they won’t work. I want so much to be happy and just be me again. I feel like there is no hope.
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  • Posted

    Hi ad's can stop working you know after a time on them so why not go back to your doctors and try some different ones.

    You haven't mentioned counselling at all.  Have you had any and are you currently?  x

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    • Posted

      Hi, I have been referred to counselling but don't have an appointment as yet. The doctor has doubled the dose of my current anti depressants but obviously these will take time to kick in. I'm also on propranalol and diazepam. Feeling ok at this moment but worried about how I will be in the morning.

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