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I've been struggling. I do the same thing everyday. I wake up debate on if today is the day. I go on the computer I melt into my fantasy life with all my games pretend that my real life problems don't exist. Pretend that my life is what it is. For a second I step into life and realize that my depression is worse and it gets worse everyday. I attempted suicide 3 years ago and failed my parents of course found out and sent me away. They love me. About a year ago I attempted suicide again but without them knowing and failed and a part of me earns for them to know a part of me wishes for it. About 2 months ago I attempted suicide again for the 3rd, 4th prob 5th time I've lost count. I took 42 pills and nothing happen it was like my day never changed nothing changed. I'm 24. I have a boyfriend and a family a huge family but a part of me just wants to not exist. I was abused and I struggle with accepting myself everyday. Though after every fail a part of me feels there's hope. I've been self harming for 9 years but a part of me has hope.
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