Im really depressed and have no idea what to do someone please help
Posted , 7 users are following.
I would really like someone to give me some advice and just read this until the end because it's something that I haven't told anyone and am really struggling with. So for the last 4 or 5 months I've been feeling so depressed and recently it's been getting worse. The main reason for this is my parents, i hate them so much. Im 14 years old and my parents are so strict about everything. Im not allowed to take my phone to school I only get 45 minutes a day on my phone and Im not allowed to go down the street or to parties (i've been to 1 party this year). The last time I caught up with friends was last year. And my dad hits me and throws stuff at me. And everyone at school knows that I can never do anything (like catch up and stuff) so I never get invited to anything. And my friends mum said that she feels really sorry for me and that when I turn 18 im just going to rebel. but no one knows that I'm actually depressed and I think i have bulimia. I told my mum but she just laughed. And the last few days I have not wanted to go to school so today I've stayed home and stayed in bed. I just want to sleep so I can get away from reality. I've tried to run away before but my parents found me. I really want to kill myself. And today my dad told people about me and I have to talk to a counsellor but I really don't want to. It might not sound so bad here but if you experienced it you would understand. Thank you for reading this and please give me advice and if you're going through something similar please contact me.
3 likes, 11 replies
lily1905
Posted
I just want to add a bit more. I self harm myself and my parents are getting my a counsellor I have to talk to them today but I don't want to tell them anything.
maria_1963 lily1905
Posted
I feel for you , you should try an talk to the counsellor as it will give you a chance to open up , let someone outside of your family know how you feel rather then keep it inside you , you have your whole life ahead of you , so much to explore , also it is a tough world out there so maybe your parents are protecting you from those dangers but i also feel your parents should allow you to have friends at your house even if they don't like you going to their , self harm shows you are in need of help , maybe the counsellor could help you communicate with your parents with you all sitting down an talk about why you are feeling unhappy , please don't do anything to end your life , do you have any hobbies ? sometimes keeping a journal on how you are feeling can help - draw pictures , etc in it , i do colouring for grown-ups as a way to help my depression - very relaxing , are there any after school clubs you could do , please , please take care an know you are not alone xx
lily1905 maria_1963
Posted
maria_1963 lily1905
Posted
Hakuna_matata lily1905
Posted
Hi Lilly I'm so sorry to hear how unhappy you are it's sounds like you feel your parents don't take what you say seriously or treat you as you want to be treated although I can assure you your not alone and you probably won't realise this at the moment but I'm sure your parents love you very much, the reason behind the strict rules demonstrates that although you are feeling trapped maybe the best approach for you would be to sit and tell them exactly how your feeling if you don't feel you can talk to them maybe leave a note for them to find whilst your at school this would give them a chance to read it absorb what's being said and process it maybe it with help them become more empathetic to your needs and help them realise that although you are their baby girl your growing into a young woman and feel desparate to be seen as an equal and/or an individual the wrong way to do these things I hope you realise is not to self harm you see a lot of people would say that self harming is a cry for help or attention and you don't want them seeing as some people may view it as a spoilt child doing something in order to get attention and her own way I'm sure this is not you but maybe that's your problem maybe that's how they are viewing it if your father is laying is hands on you then that's something you can get help with id consider talking to a teacher you may like or a friend rules at your age do seem very restrictive however they are they to teach you good lessons Hun and to keep you safe what I thing you need to do is show them how mature you are show them you've stopped self harming and eating healthy and reaponsibly then once you have proved your maturity to them maybe sit down as three adults and negotiate or ask for some compromise your parents love you so much they only want what they feel is best for you and when your older and have children of your own you'll do what you think is best for them which I can guarantee you now will not be to allow them to do as they please
lily1905 Hakuna_matata
Posted
Thank you very much for the advice
I will try to be more mature and hopefully, things will start getting better.
wayne1962 lily1905
Posted
Hi Lily - sorry to rerad of your situation. You must use this opportunity with the counsellor to voice your concerns. Nothing will change if you don't speak up. The counsellor will speak to your parents. If things don't improve or you are punished by your parents for speaking up, contact services for child protection and speak to them. Your father throwing things at you and demeaning you to other people are the tactics of a bully. Under no circumstances is such abuse of a child okay. These acts are a reflection of him, not you. You need people who will listen and not dismiss you, Your parents are stunting your growth and freedom to be a teenager - it's no wonder you have depression. BTW I survived a similar situation as a child, and yes i rebelled. Hang on to the knowledge that in a few years - if not before - you will be free to leave and be your own boss. I know it's difficult but you need to speak up. The situation will not change unless you act.
Hakuna_matata wayne1962
Posted
Hi Wayne although I agree with parts of the advice your giving Lilly and it's clear your advice is meant with good intention I agree a counsellor is a great place to talk and express her feelings and yes of course if her father is abusing her in any way then of course your completely correct and she should report this issue however I do not agree on the stunting of growth id be more included to beleive maybe her parents are a little over protective of there girl and as I advices lilly maybe a mature approach proving she is capable of making sensible desicions for herself and allowing them to realise that this is now a young lady not a baby girl would help pubity is a very tough time for teenagers in general and family ties very important in my opinion I'm not sure we should be encouraging Lilly to accept they will never realise who she is and basically saying things like no wonder your depressed as then we are saying her parents are completely in the wrong and I don't think that's the case here I think they will see that Lilly is deco loping into her own person and now growing up and realise that there's a time when children don't need to be wrapped up in cotton wool that they are smart enough not to put themselves in danger I think Lilly needs to work with her parents and understand why they have such rules family as I said is very important and at a time when Lilly hormone levels are up and down I don't think we need to add the burden upon her to say things like you'll be rid of them in a few years I hope Lilly understands the rules and grows into a lovely young lady I hope she can be adult enough to realise that family is important and I hope as a family they all take something from this post she has made and grow into a much stronger loving family that respect each other equally
lily1905 wayne1962
Posted
Thanks a lot! Yes, I've told my parents that I'm just going to rebel when I turn 18 but they don't believe me.
sandy67 lily1905
Posted
Please tell someone if your dad is abusing you! Ring child line, speak to someone before this all gets just too much for you please! Not all parents get it right all the time. I used to shout a lot cos of my own depression but my kids have always known that I love them more than anything or anyone and they know I will always be here to support them in any way i can and that they can talk to be about anything. That's how it should be with your parents and if you don't get any of that then you really need to talk to someone, even if it starts with your doctor but don't be afraid to tell them that your dad is hitting you xx
lily1905 sandy67
Posted
Thank you for the advice. I just feel like my parent's don't respect my choices and beliefs in life and that they want to control my life. I also think I'm embarrassed to talk to people (doctors, counsellors, friends) about it. But thanks!