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Im tired.

Posted , 12 users are following.

omunique1
omunique1

Ive already made up in my mind that i am going to kill myself and I know how and what date.  See i suffer from pancreatitis and Im always in severe pain.  CPS came in and removed my kids from my ex because I would go into the hospital and would be unable to work and with him being the only oneworking sometimes the lights got cut off so that the rent could be paid.  Im just tired of everything and everybody.  Im waiting for the day my 10 and 8 year old goes to school becuse I refuse to do it while they're here.  Pray for me please!!!!!!!

1 like, 28 replies

28 Replies

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  • elizabeth20203
    elizabeth20203 omunique1

    Posted

    I pray that you don't follow this through. As others have said the children will suffer. I know this to be true. My childrens father, my husband killed himself. My children at the time was 3 and 5. We live with the pain every day. We will never get over It. There are reminders and stigmas to deal with. People pointed the finger at me saying things like..... I must of drove him to It. I didn't understand what he was going through at the time but I did everything In my power to help him. He was mentally ill. At the end of the day he wouldn't get the help, thou years ago not much was available except drugs. Today there Is counselling and therapies. Believe me your children will suffer their whole lives, they will think they wern't loved. I have had a lifetime of pain also and my life changed overnight due to his actions. I blamed myself, I was a wreak for years. Please do not leave a legacy of pain and suffering for your children. There is no turning back, no more pain for you, but for your loved ones the pain will last a lifetime. You will never see your children have children of their own. I have 2 lovely grandchildren now. My husband missed out on our children growing up and his grandchildren. My children missed out on a dad and the grandchildren have no grandfathers. My husband just turned 28 and I am sad that he missed out on his life. My life has been hard, my childhood was abusive, I have been suicidal. My children and grandchildren stops me from taking the same path. Know one can stop another person from their actions only themselves can do this. 

    Please keep talking here, there are many that have felt the same including myself. We care and can support you.

    Elizabeth. Hugs xx 

    • stevo1975
      stevo1975 elizabeth20203

      Posted

      So sorry to hear of your husbend Elizabeth thats very sad it could never be another persons fault metla illness xx
    • VauxhallGirl
      VauxhallGirl elizabeth20203

      Posted

      So sorry to hear you have had to go through all this, Elizabeth. It's a shame you have had to endure some small-minded people who try to say you could have been in any way to blame.

      I hope Omunique reads your post, though, as it is a unique insight to what can happen to those left behind.

       

    • elizabeth20203
      elizabeth20203 VauxhallGirl

      Posted

      Hello Vauxhallgirl, Thank you, I only talk about It now In the hope that those reading It will think about their own situation. If It helps someone Its worth It.

      Elizabeth x  

    • VauxhallGirl
      VauxhallGirl elizabeth20203

      Posted

      Yes indeed! If you can help others with this knowledge, it turns it into a little bit of positive. Take care. xx
  • john76133
    john76133 omunique1

    Posted

    Hey! It sounds like you feel like things are hopeless and hard at the moment. I HAVE BEEN THERE. Don't do it! Your chidren would rather have you then the lights on, trust me. Please don't try to kill yourself, I worked in the hopsital and saw so many people who tried to kill themselves but they failed and now they are a THOUSAND times worse off. Call 911 and talk to an operator. You can be placed on stronger pain medication and get some medication for depression. 

    You are feeling hopeless, but your life is not hopeless. As long as tommorow will come, you will have a new day and a new chance. Suicide is a permenant solution to a temporary problem. Do it for yourself and for your kids, call 911. 

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