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In my mind I'm dying

Posted , 6 users are following.

katelyn6399
katelyn6399

Hi, I posted here before about the same type of thing. I'm 17 and have very bad health anxiety. I know I have anxiety but am still convinced im dying. For some reason I focus everything on my heart. I'm 100% convinced I'll die young from cardiac arrest. I've been to countless doctors. Had 8 ekgs an echo and just got my heart monitor off yesterday. Aside from the monitor everything else keeps coming back perfectly fine. I get my holter monitor results tomorrow.

I've worried about this before but it really started up bad again about two days ago. My heart rate was at 51 BPM while I was trying to sleep and would go no higher than 70. I thought maybe it was because I recently started lexapro 3 days before that. When my mom called the on call doctor at my pediatrician he said to watch it and if it stays low to take me to children's. Well I flipped out and we ended up going where they found nothing wrong but some mild dehydration again.

This is a never ending cycle with me and I'm absolutely lost. I feel weak and shaky everyday and can't eat right. I don't sleep normal. I'm just convinced I'll die young and the cause will be cardiac arrest. I have no clue what to do and wonder if other people have this.

0 likes, 35 replies

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  • wendywilts
    wendywilts katelyn6399

    Posted

    Hi my darling, please get your mum to find you some real help, not just a gp, although maybe some meds may help to break the cycle.

    All I can tell you is this I am 65 now and have wasted 45 years if my life convincing mysrlf I have every type of illness n

    Known to man. But my point is I have Wasted time worrying, and I am still here all those years later, and havent got or had any of the things I have obsessed over and wasted time over during all those years. Please dont go down the same road as me get some help from someone that understands, keep on till you get the treatment you deserve, and get well.

    Stop worrying, easy to say, hard to do I know, but darling we we all die somewhen, young, old in between, thats how it is, its not important, what is important is enjoying whatever time we have here, have fun, live, laugh, love, your life is just beginning, make it the best one you can.

    Worrying never stopped anything happen, it just stops you enjoying life.

    You feel weak and shaky because of anxiety and also if you arnt eating properly, so my advice for what its worth is to go get a good multi vitamin with iron, try eating good food, fruit, veg, cut out junk food, and maybe join a gym, or take up a physical exercise, (not on your own, join something) get out with friends, go dancing, anything physical it will help you feel better, if you can take control of your life you will feel safer, non of know what the future holds, we are all in the same bolt, but the only thing that really matters is now, the past is gone, and the future is unknown, all we have that is certain is Right Now

    Hope this helps xxx

  • marissa49771
    marissa49771 katelyn6399

    Posted

    I have health anxiety too and also a hypochondriac which all started for me at your age as well. I was also worried about my heart and it giving out and me dying. I'm now 27 I've had ekgs done echo halter monitors stress tests ultrasounds and the only thing they found during the ultrasound was Miltra Valve Prolapse which is common and non life threatening. It can throw off the chemical balance in the brain though and cause anxiety and panic attacks. I've had overwhelming feelings that I would just collapse and die but I'm still here. I'm on medication now Venlafaxine and feel much better. You will be ok though I guarantee you there is nothing wrong with your heart. :-)

    • marissa49771
      marissa49771 katelyn6399

      Posted

      Oh it can be very scary but it's all part of anxiety. Especially for us with health anxiety we are so convinced that something is wrong that our minds will create phantom symptoms in other words you feel these symptoms but there really and truly isn't a thing wrong with you. The mind is a powerful thing. Relax take deep breaths and your going to be just fine I promise you won't die.

    • katelyn6399
      katelyn6399 marissa49771

      Posted

      I'm trying to, this is the hardest thing I've ever dealt with and I don't know why my mind is fixated on cardiac arrest and "knowing" for a fact it'll happen.. I'm scared to do anything so I won't its just a viscous cycle

    • marissa49771
      marissa49771 katelyn6399

      Posted

      Try talking to your doctor about anxiety medications and see if he can put you on one. Venlafaxine works very well for me and my mom but you might be different and have to try something else but ask your doctor about it. Explain to him what your so worried about.
    • katelyn6399
      katelyn6399 marissa49771

      Posted

      I've been on paxil for 4 years then it started getting really bad. Thats when I developed health anxiety. I got put on lexapro and it was kinda of working but my heart rate got really low and my pediatrician said to hold off until I talk to my doctor. I kinda feel helpless at this point because I think no matter what I'll die. My mom , dad, brother boyfriend and anyone else I've talked to about it feel helpless too. Nobody knows what to do including myself

    • lisalisa67
      lisalisa67 katelyn6399

      Posted

      Do you see a psychiatrist? Or your regular doctor for the meds?  They are way more experienced with all this then your pediatrician.  They can even help you understand all this better. If yours isnt helping you get another one. You should be long into this and have had cbt, cat, act, talk therapy not just taking the pills because when they stop working its a mess. You need both the pills and intervention tools and skills.
    • katelyn6399
      katelyn6399 lisalisa67

      Posted

      Yes I do, i go to counseling too. And they want me to start CBT but my problem is I'm scared to try things. I know I need to. I need to build up the courage and change my thoughts to not think I'll die if I do things.

    • wendywilts
      wendywilts katelyn6399

      Posted

      Start by taking baby steps, slowly building up what you do, yes its scary, but so is sittlin obsessing over your fears, slowly do more physical things, you may feel worse in the beginning, but slowly you should start to realise nothing bad has happened to you, and nothing is going to. Challenge yourself, everyday, set a task to do, starting very small and building up, take as long

      as you like, no rush, you can go as slow or fast as you like, its not a race. Congratulate yourself every time you complete another goal, every task completed is another closer to overcoming your fear.

      Only you and you alone can do this, everyone will support you, but it is entirely up to you to break the cycle, begin today, do something small, go for a walk, nice abd slow and not too far, take the dog if you have one, or vacuum your room, run up and down the stairs, or go shopping with your mum, or a friend, Anything at all that gets you moving about, do the washing up, lol, anything at all,

      You will still be here and ok afterwards promise.

      Try it , you may suprise yourself, remember this is the first day of the rest of your life, make it and all the ones that follow good days.

      We all have an inner strength, its just sometimes difficult to find. You can do it xx

  • lester90053
    lester90053 katelyn6399

    Posted

    I have had a heart murmur since birth and was rejected for military service because of it. I am now 86 years old and still very much active.

    Think positive and not negative and you will survive to a ripe old age.

  • wendywilts
    wendywilts katelyn6399

    Posted

    I have written another reply which is being checked, but for now wanted to say, its not your heart that is stopping you from doing things, its your mind, its amazing what awful things we can out on ourselves.

    I suggest you do sonething physical, take a brisk walk, go swimming, then afterwards think to yourself, wow I am still here, without anything bad happening. Then plan to do something else, anything you are normally frightened to do, each day doing more and more things.

    It will be hard and scsry at first, but slowly you will realise that nothing bad has happened to you, and you actually feel much better, physically and mentally. Please take back the control, try to enjoy each day and stop worrying about the future.

    i am a Reiki Master and one of the reiki principles is ...just for today I will not worry,

    Try it, Just for today..,

    Its suprising how one day becomes two, and two three and onward, tell yourself this in the morning, then remind yourself everytime you start to worry, try it.hopefully it will help xx

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