Is this still grief after 12 weeks on 10mg of cit ?

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As you may recognise my name I have been posting on here since my cit journey began 12 weeks ago . Initially it gradually built up from June of last year when my mum went into a home and died a month to the day that she went in there . She basically gave up sand told me that she didn't want to carry on . From that day I began stomach and anxiety issues . We had to wait 6 weeks for the funeral and in that time I got anaemic to add to everything else and I just went downhill from then on . Now we are clearing the house and garden so that we can sell the house . This week all my anxiety have returned shortness of breath and tight feeling in chest and my stomach issues that include upset stomach , low abdominal ache and loss of appetite . What is wrong with me ? Every time I think I am free of this it seems like my original symptoms return . Could I psychologically cause them to come back or is it something else ? Surely after this time of bring on cit and the fact that it's 10 months since my mum passed I should be feeling better . I really don't want to be a nervous wreck forever as it stops from doing things and enjoying and appreciating life again . Sorry that this is so long winded . I hope I haven't bored everyone . Thank you Jane

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  • Posted

    I forgot to add that I am also 48 and maybe in peri menopause as the doctors have said that hormones could also being playing a part in all of this as heavy periods were causing the anaemia .
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  • Posted

    go back to the long response I wrote to you about grief therapy and different grief theories! I recommend seeing a counsellor. For starters, unresolved grief can eat away at you and severely affect your functioning. Second, 12 weeks is really NOT that long to be on cit, not really long enough to be experiencing the full benefits. And as long as you are not addressing the grief, it will be there. Like I said, look around for community support groups on grieving, sometimes funeral homes offer them, look online for resources, or at the very least, by yourself a book on grieving.

    everything you are experiencing is normal! It took me probably 2 years to properly grieve the death of one of my best friends who was trapped and died in a basement fire. 

    Also, if you aren't getting exercise daily, definitely start. 

    Good luck! 

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  • Posted

    Hi Jane xx

    When I lost both my parents I grieved for about a year ... and had small blips during that time.  I imagine with such an emotional time you've been through its bound to have caused the feelings you've had.

    You do get blips throughout the journey on these meds, and if you're starting to clear the house then that could be the reason you're feeling having one, even if you don't realise it st the time.  I found it incredibly hard sorting my parents house.

    Some things can upset our rhythm which we don't realise at the time, and it often appears as a blip - so yes, psychologically it can happen.  Don't worry, it will pass and as you get stronger the blips won't happen anymore as your body will be able to cope better in time.

    Give yourself lots and lots of time to grieve and let your body do what it wants to ❤️

    Peri menopause can also cause little blips.  

    Shortness of of breath and tightness in the chest is probably anxiety, but do get it checked out.  I know when I'm stressed I feel tightness in my chest and arms.

    K xx

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  • Posted

    Hi it's all normal to feel the way you do. Grief goes through stages & it will improve with time although at the moment this probably sounds unlikely. You have to let yourself grieve and ride through it. However I feel you need some help with grief counseling & please don't feel weak because you need help sometimes we all need help. I also think you might need 20mg of CIT to help you through this bad patch. Just keep strong and give yourself time. It's an up & down ride but you will conquer it. Get out & about & do some exercise talk to people you are not alone. Chin up & good luck
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  • Posted

    Hello Jane, I felt as though I was reading my own letter. You are not alone

    I had to place both my parents in a very expensive nursing home together ,my father died after 11 months and my mum did exactly what yours did, gave up and only lasted another 6 weeks. They were 86 . I was selling the house sorting that etc for two years whilst they were there

    I know what your saying and 

    everyone has written back so supportively to you and I agree with them although don't always stand strong myself! 

    i am no longer on cit . I took it in 2014 .My GP wanted  me off it after 6 months . It then took a year to slowly do that .

    i am starting some counselling this week. Not direct to grieving, more the whole anxiety issue , My GP gave me a leaflet when I had a blip..I have had several...and I self referred myself.

    i am hoping it will help

    i do find going to the gym and exercise and meditation techniques help. I try to live in the present moment..I often fail..such is human weakness ..I too wish I had the answer and am hearing what your saying re physchological causes. Am sure your right to an extent

     

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    • Posted

      Thank you . It's just so hard . Every time that you think you are picking up you seem to drop back down again . So many people have said that this is normal though . I suppose grief is a funny thing and how it affects you . Also I think I am peri menopausal and my doctor says that my hormones are probably all over the place which is not good for symptoms and anxiety . I just hope that I get there sooner rather then later .
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  • Posted

    Just to let you know I spoke to the pharmacist that gave me advice when I first went onto cit and seems very knowligble . She said that different brands can cause a reaction , as although the main ingredients are the same there can other elements within them that can effect you if you haven't had that brand before . So. I am going back to my doctors in the morning to get a new prescription ordered tomorrow as none of the local chemists have it in stock . It's all fun and games I thought this just be useful information to everyone
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    • Posted

      I read that somewhere too.  Usually the outer coating shell can be different, but the active ingredient inside should be the same.  I say 'should be' ........ maybe there is a variation with brands.

      Thats really interesting the pharmacist said that.  No wonder some people post on here of having symptoms if their brand is changed.  I shall keep that in mind if ever I see my meds are a different brand.

      K x

       

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  • Posted

    Jane,,

    I'm no expert but from what I know and have experienced in grief there is nothing wrong with you. This has been a traumatic event in your life and grief can show up long after and most surprisingly when you don't expect it. I'm sure you won't be a wreck forever but grief can change our perspective on life. You are not long winded and haven't bored me I can promise you. 

    My sister lost her husband 2-1/2 years ago and she is still in grief that catches her off guard. I know there are people that go for years. I think the more we have loved someone or something, the longer it may take so just be good to yourself. She says the same thing, when will I be able to not have a dark cloud over my head. We are all different and it takes time.

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