ive been depressed for such a long time now,

I know it’s a pain having to wait to see someone, who may be able to help you, but surely it’s worth holding on if it will make you feel better.

Is your husband helpful and supportive or part of the problem?  Sometimes partners can seem uncaring because they haven’t a clue what to do to make us feel better, so they pretend there isn’t a problem and ignore it, which is not that they don’t care, even if it seems like it.  I’ve been widowed for 12 years and the only thing I can think of as being worse than being on my own is being tied to someone who doesn’t care or love me.

Is there anything that you do like, however small, like a sunny day, flowers, anything that you can focus on that makes you feel good, while you are waiting?  If you have any real friends, talk to them, go visit, do something that you enjoy doing.

I always think of people like Tony Hancock, who gave up, just before a break would have helped him.  The saying “It’s often darker before the dawn” is so true, so don’t give up, just because it’s hard, it is hard, but you could be denying yourself some happiness, which it really sounds like you need and deserve.

I’m 65, and still here, sometimes it’s a big struggle when I feel so alone and unloved, but I’m a fighter, guess you are too, as you say you’ve felt depressed for so long.  Be a Warrior Queen and don’t let them grind you down.

Marie xx

Ive been suffering with depression on and of for about 10yrs or so, and I've always carried on going to work but this time I've been of work for some 6 months now as it's the worst bout I've ever suffered. I've been taking Fluoxetine but have recently had these changed and I'm hoping that they will help me with my sadness and general feeling of no motivation. I'm sure that by trying to stay positive helps and hope that you to can carry on and like a lot of us fight this horrible illness to be back as happy as we were before.

Sorry if I've rambled on and not made much sense but I'm not a great writer, take care . Xx

This is 2nd attempt at reply, pressed wrong button and it disappeared.

I know what you mean about being upset about your body, I’m probably at least 4 stone overweight and even if I lost the weight,  I’d end up with loose saggy skin, I don’t know which is worse, none of it’s pretty.

Currently, my love handles have love handles, I find it difficult to put my shoes on, let alone do them up.  Bear in mind that most men of our age (and sometimes younger) are nothing to write home about either.  OK, there are exceptions both with men and women and they make some of us (me anyway) feel inadequate.  Someone I used to work with said about someone gorgeous “No-one normal looks that good, they must be deformed”.  I liked that.  Unfortunately, time catches up with most of us and our glory days are past, good looks and figures disappear, but, unless you can afford cosmetic surgery, it catches us all up eventually.

Have you seen your doctor and been diagnosed as depressed?  Whether you have or not, you should go back and speak to your GP, you could have some undiagnosed illness such as a low thyroid condition or another illness, and they make be able to provide treatment to help, either with some form of counselling or medication.

I don’t know what to suggest re: hubby, if he wasn’t so miserable, perhaps you would feel better too, but is it just with you being depressed that he is miserable or has he always been like that?

Would volunteering or working give you something to focus on and give you a life outside the house?  I know myself, if I do nothing, I feel more tired than I do if I actually do something, so maybe if you took the dogs out more or for longer walks,  it might help.  Just getting dressed may help and if you gradually work up to doing more you may find that you have more energy.  Exercise, in moderation to start with, especially walking in the fresh air can be very beneficial.  If you give it a try and it doesn’t work, you can always go back to the couch.  I’d definitely try the GP though, nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Warrior Queen Astrid does have a nice ring to it though, doesn’t it?