Posted , 4 users are following.
hi, this is the first time i openly talked about this topic to anyone because i feel like i cant talk to anyone about this. i dont really know if im depressed but research has been telling me i do. every day i just sit there and think about how horrible my life is going and how i know it wont get any better. i just feel like everyone hates me especially the people close to me, i go to school i have good friends but they think that i have a normal life but i really dont. i kinda know for a fact that my life will stay horrible. suicide is on my mind constantly every day, and i know if i commit suicide it will make the people close to me happy because im a disappointment and i dont deserve to be alive and i dont want to stay alive i just want to die. and it will be better for everyone else if im gone for good right. there is only one thing thats stoppinng me and that is religeon but i dont know how long i can last. i have insomia and bruxism and so much other problems, nothing good is happening in my life and it never did tbh. i dont understand why im still alive i dont want to be, everyday i pray that i will die any time soon. im still a teen i just had a broken childhood noone really knows about any of this. when i go to school i tried to ignore this but lately ive been under so much stress and family problems that i cant think normally. sometimes i even think im losing my sanity. honestly im just lost and dont know what to do anymore. you know it just sucks that i dont get a normal life an get to be happy all my friends seem to be happy and i have normal lives but its just me in a corner by myself. i dont show that im depressed at school and im quite outgoing but when i come back home it just hell. i just need advice at the moment to make me feel better but i cant get it from anyone. also i cant go to a GP about this or see a specailist because im underage and dont want my family to know about this, not like they even care or anything.
2 likes, 2 replies
julia23547 lara97816
Posted
Well done Lara for opening up and telling us. I am a mother of a teen and trust me, I would want to know if my child was struggling the way you are right now. You need support, people who struggle with a depressive disorder get better quicker than those who don't reach out. Suicide is not the answer and you need to tell someone you are feeling this way. Nobody hates you and your mother would be devastated if she knew her child was suffering like this. Do you have a friend or an aunt that you could open up to. You are not alone, you think you are but it's the depression making you feel this way. Please, take a deep breath and tell someone. Your family will want to help you but you have to be brave and make that first step. You've been brave to tell us, now find a bit more courage and talk to your mum. Good luck Lara. I'm thinking of you sweetie. Xx
Aspinan lara97816
Posted
Hi Lara, Julia,s advise is right, you need to talk abd you also need to go to the GP, I'm not aware of an age restriction for going to see your GP on your own. You could be referred to talking therapy through CAMS (Children and Adolescent Mental Health Service), you are suffering from severe depression from what you have said and you need to get help quickly. You have your faith so keep praying.
Suicide is not the answer your friends and family would be devastated, the world is a better place with you in it.
Depression is an illness that can be treated and you will feel better and think normally again once you get the right help.
Be brave Lara and speak to someone and get yourself on the road to recovery and happiness.
Neil
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