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life is too hard

Posted , 7 users are following.

sandy67
sandy67

I just feel I don't wanna be here anymore. I cant be bothered doing anything, getting dressed or even washed. I keep thinking maybe if I asked my partner to leave it may help. Everything he does makes me angry and he never let's me out of his sight!! I just smashed the toilet up in anger and cut my hand. My finger didn't stop bleeding for ages. He has a go about my kids all the time and I'm sick to death of it. I feel like taking all my pills but I would be ruining my kids life's too if I did that. I'm trapped! I can't take much more

3 likes, 24 replies

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  • amanda35274
    amanda35274 sandy67

    Posted

    My heart goes out to u sandy.. u sound so unhappy. U need 2 c the dr maybe be reffered to have some counselling.& poss meds xxx u shud have freedom in a relationship. And yes its hard wen u have kids bless as we gotta b around for them xxx make tht appt asap to start with & good things will follow xx

    • sandy67
      sandy67 amanda35274

      Posted

      Hi Amanda thanks for replying. I am already on meds and have been for years and did try counselling but didn't help. Then on another occasion I was turned down for counselling cos he said I didn't need it on my first assessment. The one i had was from work and it was telephone counselling. My kids are older, 22 and 20 but both still with me at home and still dependant in a lot of ways. They will always be my number one priority and I'm sick of him.moaning about everything they do. I told him last night that he is making me.worse and think he should just stay at his own flat and I need space but it ended up in a horrible argument and he made me feel guilty as he always does. I just don't know what to do. My physical health is not good either so I just end up in bed all the time, hating my life and dreaming about another one x

    • amanda35274
      amanda35274 sandy67

      Posted

      Ohh bless u sweetie ive done tht before xxx i left my marriage 7 yrs ago we still bicker as we have a teen and shes grt but shes now fed up with his moaning etc n we constantly disagree so i couldnt imagine u still living through it...id go stir crazy! Here to talk any time on here or p.msg me watever u like. Its good to talk. Im like u with the yrs of meds n counselling n still it comes back! Xxx
  • amanda35274
    amanda35274 sandy67

    Posted

    My heart goes out to u sandy.. u sound so unhappy. U need 2 c the dr maybe be reffered to have some counselling.& poss meds xxx u shud have freedom in a relationship. And yes its hard wen u have kids bless as we gotta b around for them xxx make tht appt asap to start with & good things will follow xx

  • borderriever
    borderriever sandy67

    Posted

    Sandy

    If you feel in danger of a suicide, call NHS Helthline Information on Tel 111

    Whatever you decide you need to discuss your feelings with your Doctor. Are the children yours and not your partners ?. Is it this that is causing you problems ?.

    You are a sufferer of Depression, go see your GP and see if a course of CBT may help you. Do you also feel that You and Partner would benefit from some appointments with RELATE, you will find out where they are from the Library, GP Surgery or Telephone book. 

    It all depends I suppose on the dynamic of your homelife and Partner

  • cycad
    cycad sandy67

    Posted

    Yes, I hear you. Depression certainly takes a lot away, so much so that it reaches a point where even hope begins to fade - I know it only too well. Keep battling sandy67, keep fighting, don't let the goodness in you die. Reach out and see if you can go to the park to feed the ducks and enjoy the fresh air and the trees. Those kinds of things always give me good feelings and I can say to myself I didn't let my depression win today. Keep looking for answers and making changes. We'll get there in the end, it'll be okay. All the best sandy67.  

    • amanda35274
      amanda35274 cycad

      Posted

      Bless u cycad. Xxx all things like the beach listening to the water. Watching the squirrels in my garden eating the monkey nuts i buy so i can watch them so grt to get my mind away from it all. Although if dep n anx severe in my case nothing works @ that tym till im a bit better. But such good advice. Good luck all the best to u & sandy! ???

    • cycad
      cycad amanda35274

      Posted

      Thanks amanda35274, much appreciated. Bless you as well. I've never seen a squirrel. Yes, nature always reminds me there's something wondrous going on - even in the depths of despair (oddly enough) which gives me hope beyond this life. It's pretty awesome.

    • sandy67
      sandy67 cycad

      Posted

      Thank you. I'm going to make an effort to start getting out . With having a physical illness too, its quite hard but I am determined to make the effort x

  • gary78460
    gary78460 sandy67

    Posted

    counciling dosent work for every1 but admitting you need help is a great start to sorting things out,think your partner needs to give you some space and to back off with the kids abit,if he cant then hes not the 1 for you im affraid,relationships work on mutual respect no ifs and buts,then its time to get out and about and motivate yourself,just occupying your mind helps as you 4 get for a while your depressed and the more this happens the longer it will last,there is a way to happyiness you just somtimes need to fight hard for it,if you need to talk message me i will listen and help if i can smile stay strong and keep fighting the fight

    • sandy67
      sandy67 gary78460

      Posted

      Hi thanks for reply. I'm starting gym and swim next week so hoping that may make me feel better. I would like to go on my own or with my daughter. I told him to stay away for a few days last week and enjoyed the time on my own but then guilt gets me so he's back. I get angry when he is with me 24 7 and would love to just take off somewhere totally on my own for a while. I feel like i cant take much more and end up shouting and then staying in bed wanting to pull the quilt over me and do nothing and say nothing. Hopefully once I start the swimming things will start to feel better. I wanna get back to work too! That's an escape for me. But I can't just yet, im not up to it

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