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I'm not sure if I'm worse than I realise so bare with me, ever since I can remember I've be intensely anxious, school was a constant struggle, a battle in my mind in which one side was desperate to learn about the world around me and on the other a voice. The voice really started to get loud at 12 years old or so, at first it was just pure negative (you're hopeless, nobody likes you,kill you're self) I left school and literally that day walked into my bedroom and didn't come out for months. The uncontrollable thoughts in my mind ruled my life. I finally was convinced by family to get out and start looking for a job, the very notion of going for a job interview was on the terror level that I'd imaged coming face to face with a large predator. I felt so utterly hopeless. To bring a long story short the voices got quite as I assumed a stable life. Until 2 years ago when a member of my partners family threatened me over seemingly nothing, at first I was shaken by the whole thing, but that evening the voices started, I found them telling me he was a threat to me and my family and I should kill him before he kills us. This ran over and over in my head, but it got so intense I started thinking my colleges were out to get me and some of my closest friends and family became threats, "has somone poisoned my drink" was a popular touture in my mind, I told a doctor of my thoughts but he more or less shrugged it off. I have had several physical in counters with people over my paranoia in the years. I know I've gone on a bit but can anyone see from the short version of my strange behaviour if you recognise something. I'm now going through a downward spiral again, thank you for reading my shortened story any reply if welcome
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