Life with and after depression

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Hi all

I regularly wrote and chatted on this forum last year and found it a huge help, but haven't been on for some time - apologies if i didnt reply to any of the lovely people i'd chatted with!

Just wanted to let people know that really you can and will get through through this but please be patient! I went through all sorts of side effects with fluoxetine and sometimes it was hard to see a light at the end of the tunnel. I am so glad i stuck it out as i have now got my life back, the fear and anxiety are gone and i am really enjoying life to the full again, something that i couldnt even imagine 12 months ago.

I know i am not cured forever , it doesnt work like that and i continue to take a low dose as a precaution while i go through some big changes (all good ones though!). I hope hearing this will help someone to keep persuing happiness.

Everyone is different but there is hope. Persevere, talk to friends and family (hiding this will not help), be honest, most of all rest if you can and look after yourself.

I wish everyone who is suffering from depression the strength to keep going and find their happy place again, it is there just dont give up in it .

Good luck all, you'll get there.

Vix xx

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  • Posted

    I am just starting my 6th month on fluoxetine and the last few days have felt low again. I still feel like I have no motivation and the blues. I am def better than I was but is this how you felt around this time. I am also pregnant so it could be from the hormones sad
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    • Posted

      Yes i think so, couldn't shake the underlying blueness for quite some time but there were lots of ups and downs along the way. I knew i was much better than when i started though so that gave me hope.

      Im pretty sure the move to 30mg was the final step though i only took it for few months (mostly cos i kept forgetting the one every other day!) but it seemed to have already done the job.

      And yes the pregnancy can cause you all sorts of ups and downs itself! I know, im 13 weeks! So had all the fatigue, two major scares and now headaches but ive been waiting too long for this to give in to the blues!!!

      How far on are you? I used to chat to a girl on here that only got depression in pregnancy poor love! As if you dont have enough to contend with .

      I can only say for me it took a long time to get to my happy place with down days in between. But i got there and eventually stayed there. You can too. One day at a time.

      Take care

      Vix xx

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    • Posted

      Thank you! I think a lot of the problem is that I got depression after a miscarriage at 5 1/2 and took 10 fluoxetine and it cured me within 3 months and I stopped the medication. I was fine for about a year and half and a lot of depressing problems hit with deaths in the family so I started it back and then found out I'm pregnant. I've stayed on a low dose the whole time but have continued to have up and down depression which scares me for postpartum depression. I'm 27 weeks now so not much more to go.
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    • Posted

      Hi, Nicole. At 6mo. I felt the same as you. No motivation and low spells.  I think that is pretty much the way it happens for a lot of people. Just keep hanging in there and you will come through.
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    • Posted

      I'm a little over 6 1/2 mo. in now. I am not feeling low, but not quite my normal happy self yet. No anxiety, except maybe a little first thing in the morning. Starting to get more motivation back. I think I'm almost there! 
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    • Posted

      That's good because I don't have any motivation either but I'm pregnant and always tired. My hormones are also constantly up and down so I'm sure that's not helping my recovery. I'm still anxious from time to time worrying about postpartum afterwards.
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    • Posted

      Yea, it seems you are progressing about like I am. Just keep plugging along and we are both gonna come through this. smile
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    • Posted

      So sorry to hear about your previous miscarriage, no wonder your mood is all over the place. Mine has been without that worry on top.

      I took citalopram two yrs ago for 4 months and felt so well, totally cured like you so stopped taking it as i was trying for a baby. I know now i stopped it way too soon as i too as i ended back at square one in fact worse just over a year later. So this time on fluox i stayed on it with advice from my very good dr. So here i am an older mum pregnant with twins!!!!! Mad but delighted😜

      Its quite possible that your hormones will totally settle after the birth, right now get all the rest you can and look after yourself! And dont expect too much of yourself, or try to be jolly for other people. If youre having a bad day remember its just that and just run with it if you can, tomorrow brings a whole new day. Im lucky, i have some great friends who would just come n sit with me if i was miserable and not try to force me to cheer up. The company was def good for me tho.

      Not long for you now, happy times on their way just hang in there xx

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    • Posted

      Today I woke up feeling low. Probably in a day or two, or maybe even this afternoon I will feel better again. Such a long process.
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  • Posted

    hi vix, im so glad your finally doing well. my daughter was on the meds, and you helped me enormously, she started on them in october 2014, and in june the dr said he wanted her off them as she was fine. So we pushed for the liquid, and she began to reduce the dose. she had to see a different gp in july, and this go said she wasnt ready to come off yet, and needed a good 6 months stable, so she put her back on the 20mg tablets in july, and she is still doing well. She is off to barcelona soon, and has recently been to dublin, she is back to the happy bubbly girl we knew before this nasty illness took hold.

    she hasnt had a blanket day in ages, and her emotions are alot more settled.

    well done my lovely, on coming out the other side, still smiling, its a long hard road, but im looking forward to xmas this year, it will be so much happier than last!!

    keep smiling vix. xx

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    • Posted

      Hi karen

      Its lovely to hear from the people i used to chat with, esp when its so positive!! My first lot of ad's i felt so great after 4 months i came off and was fine for nearly a year. But it hit me again and much worse with no apparent reason. Dr said i should not have come off until id been well for at least six months and now i completely understand why (your first gp gave very bad advice).

      So glad to hear your daughter is doing so well, dont rush her coming off them there is no need unless theres any side effects. Im happy to keep taking them for a while and will probably do so for longer than anticipated as i am currently pregnant and just like buses, you wait for ages (9 yrs!)and they come along in twos!!(twins in my 40's, omg!!! Fabulous but scary😜).

      So to avoid any risk of ante or post natal depression im staying on low dose on drs advice but safe so im happy with that (not in a perfect world but as we know its far from that).

      Its amazing what you can do when you come through the other side of anxiety and depression but i know i mustnt forget and still need to me good to myself and avoid things and people that have the potential to knock me back. Hope your daughter remembers that too.

      Your daughters very lucky to have had you to help her through this and you'll always be closer than ever after this. Im so grateful to some wonderful friends and family who i couldnt have done it without so i know howuch you will mean to her. Xx

      So lovely to hear from you. Your posts helped me lots too. X

      Take care

      Vix xx

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    • Posted

      OMG!!  congratulations!!!!! and twins, my word, thats just fabulous, i had my babies very close together, if i could give you advise it would be routine, routine, routine, i use to cook tea at 9am when they slept, so when hubby came home from work , i could go and have a nice bath, it took away the pressure somehow.

      thankyou for your nice words, and there will be no rushing her to come of the fluox tablets, i actually spoke to the nice lady dr before my daughter saw her, to fill her in, daughter doesnt know this, and i just wasnt happy with the first gp trying to rush her.

      me and daughter were chatting the other day about how its a year since she was so poorly with her tummy, and the depression followed, and how i used to sit holding her, promising it would get better, i didnt realise just how much my words meant to her, or the big ciddles we would have when it all got to much and she needed her blanket days. I used to bring hot flannels for her to wash her face and hands, and dab her tears as they fell all day long.She says if it wasnt for me and her tablets she doesnt think she would be here, that breaks my heart that she felt so bad. 

      please use all your friends and family to help you with the babies, just remember, you are as precious as them,

      i have no idea where you live but i wish it was next door to me!!! i have a huge big smile for you!!

      take care. xxxxx

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