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Living in isolation with no one to turn to

Posted , 10 users are following.

jason1602
jason1602

After spliting from my partner of 15yrs, losing my house, kids, dog, well basically everything. I became depressed, I went to see my local GP who sent me to see some therapeit, who told me I was just being anxtious. Then the sale of our house went through and I had to move to another area, since then I have only been out of the house to go to work and once socially. I have no friends or family who I can talk to. If I try to talk to family I just get told you will get over it and count your blessing there are people worse off than you. Better add that I have been on my own now for three years. I work on my own and have next to no contact with people during the day, Moving to a new area meant changing doctors surgery and I thought they maybe more helpful than the last, but I was wrong, they are a lot worse. I have phoned trying to get an appointment, but all I got was a telephone call from someone (that seemed to pretend to be) a doctor. I was given a prescription over the phone for one months worth of anti-depressants. Which I took as described on the packet. After the coarse finished I have had severe headaches and phoned the surgery again asking if this was normal, but missed the return call as working and can't have a mobile with me. Getting no luck with my GP surgery I have tried to change surgery's but have been told by all that I can't as I am out of their catchment area. I have spoken to the surgeys manager who said she would look into it and never heard anything back. I tried to speak to a few other organisations regarding this, and to be honest no one seems to give a toss, just seem to be trying to fight a losing battle. Have got to the point now of just wanting it to end as I don't want to carry on like this anymore. Trying to get help and having the door shut on you time and time again. 

0 likes, 29 replies

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  • paul67642
    paul67642 jason1602

    Posted

    you will get there in the end

    I losted my girlfriend in may this year so am at breaking point  i have things in my head to take all my tablets to be with my girlfriend

    • lorraine28330
      lorraine28330 paul67642

      Posted

      Paul it's so very soon to be expecting to be feeling better after a bereavement. Just a question..... Would your girlfriend want you to die ? 

      Life fe is so precious and I believe that suicide is a permenant solution to a temporary problem.....believe me I don't say this easily, I have tried to end my life many times and each time I have survived I have had a time of wishing I had succeeded but years later I realise what I was throwing away,. Please talk to someone, get some help and maybe join a support group in your area.

      all the best

    • jason1602
      jason1602 lorraine28330

      Posted

      Paul, It's been three years for me. I would imagine if you can get help and support where you live it will get better in time. For me nothing has changed in 3 years, to be honest I would say it has got worse
  • lorraine28330
    lorraine28330 jason1602

    Posted

    Hi Jason,

    it it does sound like you have had a lot to deal with, firstly losing all of the things you mentioned is going to be almost like a bereavement so you will need time and support to get through this. Have you looked for support groups in your area ? As for changing g.ps you can call the nhs line on 111 and they will tell you what surgeries you have the choice of in your area. You really don't have to put up with bad service from your go. You are worth more than that.

    as for work are you able to have interaction with anyone in the day at all ?  Support groups can offer not just a place to talk but social integration too so that's very important

    • jason1602
      jason1602 lorraine28330

      Posted

      Thks Lorraine, 

      Have tried the NHS 111 number, they only seemed interested in whether I have been to Africa in the last few weeks, my answer was no and they told me to speak to my GP. I have spoke to every GP surgery within a 20 mile radius of where I live and been told the same thing by every one of them. Looked into support groups in my area, not one has returned a phone call. It's not that difficult either really, as I have an answer machine at home and voicemail on my mobile, but not even a message. 

      I have no social life at all, the very few people I know have familys and spend their time together with each other. During the week I get home about half five and don't see or speak to anyone till about half eight the next day, and at weekends finish friday (again about half five) and don't see or speak to anyone till monday morning. I know I am going downhill, but have got to the point where I don't really care anymore.

    • lorraine28330
      lorraine28330 jason1602

      Posted

      have you go a mind centre in your area ? Is that who you have tried ? From my understanding when we get calls for support where I work, we are not allowed to leave voicemails or messages on answer machines in case they are picked up by a loved one or someone it's not meant for so maybe if they have tried and not got you they may try again.

      i think it's important for you to change gps or at least let them know that you are not getting the help that you want and deserve. It's your right and they do have a duty of care to you.

      please keep trying, you need and deserve this support,

       

  • chrisdevelop
    chrisdevelop jason1602

    Posted

    I know what it is like Jason, the trick is to put your foot down call the Manager and say to him quite sternly, "is this what you call communication, i bring you a problem and you cant even be bothered to write or call me back, iv brought the problem to you, so what are you doing about it!.

    Dont shout this at him but say it like you mean it.  I have had the same in hospital, if you are there meek and mild, and dont force the point nothing will get done.  

    They have a duty to provide the service, so let them do it, and if they dont tell them so.  These days, you cant just wait and wait and wait, if you do that nothing will happen.

    If your not getting the answers you need them tell them your not and insist they give the answers to your questions, and that includes doctors, nurses and reception, if your being ignored or no one is giving you answers, then tell them they are not being professional and they have a duty of care.  

    Go back and see the manager, let me know how you get on.

    • audrey96558
      audrey96558 chrisdevelop

      Posted

      Couldn't agree more.

      You have to be firm but fair, and really stand your ground in these situations.

      It's so unfortunate that its when we are at our lowest we have to do this, if we don't have a friend or family member or advocate to do it for us.

      The amount of times I've had to go into battle with receptionists, secretaries, clinicians themselves. It's very difficult.

      You've given spot on advice.

      Best wishes xx

  • michael98615
    michael98615 jason1602

    Posted

    thats hard stuff you been through man, it seams ur family ur trying to turn for help have no understanding of your feelings, and ur supposed to get over it, as if u were a robot, it seams ur trying to do things by the book, continueing to work, taking ur meds as precribed by the packet ( no dissrespect as if ur a robot ) with regards to gettin GP appoinments, i think things are changing beyond their control, in fairness they are over worked, they get cuttbacks, and course new claiments they are unfamilier with, i guess will get over looked,

    i myself cant help, as i'm in a similiar possition to you, if i cud end my life right now, i would, i'm holding on to my next gp appointment, support worker this coming tuesday, and finding it hard to look forward till then,

    all in all, i guess life sucks

  • rachel62244
    rachel62244 jason1602

    Posted

    There is situation depression and clinic it sounds that this is due to your situation and the good news is although hard you can change this! U need to get a doctor's appointment and ADS over the phone is gross I didn't think this could happen !!!! Are u in the UK? Headaches are normal yes they have side effects that should ease over time
    • jason1602
      jason1602 rachel62244

      Posted

      I didn't think that they would give me anti depresants over the phone but they did. It took all of about 45 seconds for the doctor to tell me there was a prescription waiting for me at the dispensory. Yes I am in the UK
    • rachel62244
      rachel62244 jason1602

      Posted

      That is gross that should never happened anti d's are not like sweets and they can cause people to worsen. How did u find the meds and did u get ur next set ? Iv never known a doctor not see you two weeks after starting ! I'm shocked. Change doctors I'd say. My gp sees me every two weeks to check on me even though I'm treated for postrich natal depression and anxiety by the home treatment at the hospital. It does sound like if you can change your life the depression would lift which I know is hard when u feel so alone. Iv not experience thus as my depression is clinic as iv no reason to be depressed at all sad are u still seeing your children ?
    • jason1602
      jason1602 rachel62244

      Posted

      Only had 4 weeks worth of meds. Have tried to contact the gp but don't seem to want to give me an appointment only want to diagose me over the phone. Keep missing the return call as working.

    • rachel62244
      rachel62244 jason1602

      Posted

      Ask for an appointment! Say it's personal and you don't want to talk on the phone. Theor playing with fire giving ads out over the phone with no follow up
    • jason1602
      jason1602 rachel62244

      Posted

      Trouble is I have no trust or confidence in the surgery due to how I have been treated. Tried changing but cant. Looking at getting something off the Internet. I know you shouldn't, but when your at the bottom it can't make it any worse
    • jason1602
      jason1602 rachel62244

      Posted

      3 yrs of trying to get help and have got nowhere . . As the song say "you don't need an army to fight a losing battle"

      Thanks everyone for the comments and suggestions but feel this is a fight I can't win.

    • Ellie1943
      Ellie1943 jason1602

      Posted

      I suggest it's because your still working that they're not taking you seriously. You have to insist on an appointment, some reception staff are like bulldogs guarding their doctors. Tell them it's urgent, don't mention work! Make sure you are there when they call back if this is the only way you can speak to a GP! You need to take a day off and get sorted! You don't seem to be taking any advice on this forum so far. If you're so depressed you need help now not when you can find time to have a day off work. Please listen to those who know!
    • jason1602
      jason1602 Ellie1943

      Posted

      It's not that I am not listening to the advice. . Everything that has been suggested so far I have already tried many times over the last 3 years. Yes that's right 3yrs of getting nowhere

      When you've been knocked down as many times as I have it's hard to get back up and easier to stay down.

      Tonight I have emailed well being for the third time this year. And to be honest I am expecting the same response as the last two times. Which will be nothing

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