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Living single with peri is hard

Posted , 12 users are following.

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Guest

Anyone else out there alone?  I’m not married and have no children.  Peri makes me feel so lonely, especially when something is wrong.  My parents, sister, and nephews live only 10-15 minutes from me, but it seems farther.  I used to be so independent and now just feel so alone and scared.  I feel bad having to rely on them when something is wrong and sometimes I just don’t tell them.  Unfortunately, that makes me feel more isolated.  In the last two years, they’ve seen me through a surgery and several doctors appointments. I also have Crohn’s disease.  I don’t know if I can keep living alone.  It definitely feels better to have company, especially when the panic and anxiety are bad.  My mom went through a few years before her hysterectomy when she absolutely could not be alone, so I know she understands that aspect.  Would love to hear from others in this situation to support each other. 🌸

4 likes, 25 replies

25 Replies

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  • maria_03422
    maria_03422 Guest

    Posted

    Hi Liz

    i'm married with grown children and i use to feel isolated and alone!! the sadness was horrible, i will put my head down and cry!

    When all this insanity started 8 years ago, i was scared to be alone, my husband will go to work and i keep thinking horrible things will happen to me or i will seat there and miss my kids and the old days i had with them..

    I can tell you things are changed, i love to be alone just me and a book! im not scared to drive alone go and walk through a shopping mall or just take a drive. I love doing things bu myself..is like meditation for me.

    it will get better, is the crazy hormones!

    I do have a cousin that she just started going through this, she never had kids and recently separated from her husband, she sounds exactly like you! she is been second guessing all her lifetime decisions!! i talk with her almost everyday try to make her understand will get better..

    xxxxxxxx

     

  • julie54379
    julie54379 Guest

    Posted

    I understand. Have been alone, but with my young son during the scariest of symptoms, wondering if I would wake up next morning and he would find me, so I understand. And this came after never having any health problems.

    And I understand how sometimes you can't or don't want to tell others bc they wouldnt understand or may not want to hear it.

    But we understand and do. You are not alone.

    Anytime you ferl that way, jump on this site! Love and hugs!

  • anetta94863
    anetta94863 Guest

    Posted

    I live with a family and I feel equally scared and lonely. I think it is a state of mind, some inner tension rather than an actual response to outside stmuli. I noticed that I need more and more people around to feel secure. Before one person was enough, now I need 3 and 4 and so on. It si stupid, and hurtful and makes me think that I do not control myself, and I get angry at that. It is like going back to early childhood.
    • maddysmom2015
      maddysmom2015 anetta94863

      Posted

      Anetta nailed it for me. This is as much about a state of mind as it is a complex nexus of social issues. I do feel way less in control of myself now at 51 than I did at 40.  It is scary. And to feel better,  I have to be around the kind of people who will de-escalate my anxiety rather than ask something of me. It is like being a pre-teen.
    • Guest
      Guest anetta94863

      Posted

      Thanks, Anetta.  I don't necessarily need a lot of people around me, but anyone who is with me has to make me feel secure in some way.

    • Guest
      Guest maddysmom2015

      Posted

      Yes, they have to be people who make me feel better somehow.  It's okay if it's just one person as long as that person isn't anxious like I am.

  • anetta94863
    anetta94863 Guest

    Posted

    I think it is more of an inner tension than anything else. I know women who have perfect marriages, lost of family and friends yet during peri they come up with paranoid thoughts of their husbands being infateful. It is like our brains in withdrawal from hormones are looking for sth to worry about. We have perfect lives we find some unlikely, illogical reasons to be insecure about. We are single-we blame it on being single. Etc.
    • Guest
      Guest anetta94863

      Posted

      I see what you mean.  There is definitely paranoia involved!
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