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Living with a person in constant pain

Posted , 2 users are following.

Guest
Guest

Hello I would like to describe what its like living with a person whose in constant pain from one or more of his ailments, Diabetes, Heart Failure, Nuropathy, Amputations, 80%Blindness, Depression, Housebound, Hallucinations. Low blood pressure, I think i would describe it as \"living with a time bomb\" waiting for it to go off, not knowing the level of pain or depresion each day brings to this person. The guilt I feel for not being able to do more, the guilt I feel when I go out the door, Watching this person in so much pain, but worried that if he takes to many pain killers or anti-depressives what side affects he will have, Each time he is taken into hospital he seems to come out not much better, I think the depression is the worst, watching someone who has worked two jobs most of his life, become someone who somedays finds it hard to get out of bed because his day is going to be filled with pain and bad thoughts. Trying to motivate someone like this is very hard and also very upsetting for myself. I have decided to look for a group or meeting where I can talk to people with the same or similar situation. I do hope you can help. Thank-you

0 likes, 3 replies

3 Replies

  • Guest
    Guest

    Posted

    I am the person with the constant pain in my relationship. I found that the best thing he ever did for me was to tell me how he was feeling. He had avoided it in fear of causing me more issues. But what happen was very different. I know now that he is really in this experience with me and I am not alone. He has pain as well. I smile more through the pain because I know how he feels and that together we can still have a wonderful life.
  • Funnell22
    Funnell22

    Posted

    Hello,

    Since April 08 I have been in constant pain, the Doctors think it is Sciatica or something similar and I am on a nice cocktail of drugs to try to help me cope. My husband is also currently suffering from a severe case of depression which I think has been building up for a year or so but he had been avoiding in the hope it would all go away. We have a 2 year old daughter who thankfully brings us both some relief from our own personal demons. I am really struggling to cope with everything at the moment as he is unable to talk much about what he is going through and I feel so helpless when I just want him to get better fast, added to this is that he has been off work for about 5 weeks now but his company do not pay very much sick leave so now I am worrying that when he next gets paid it will be just SSP and I won't have enough money to pay all the bills and the childminding fees. Feel completely helpless at the moment and really don't know what to do about it all.

  • Guest
    Guest

    Posted

    Hi,

    I know this is perhaps late in receipt. You must be experiencing a very difficult time. On the finances front I childmind myself and I would suggest talking to the childminder in confidence, perhaps they could reduce the rate, accept partial fees in the interim, set out a payment plan for you. Bear in mind that a childminder of today clearly has her own bills to pay too. I would seek help in the form of varying areas, local groups/hospital sessions/GP referral/well woman clinic/counselling/healing possibly a local church,faith,belief structure (3rd party sometimes helps better as you may hold back with family and close friends). I trust this allays some of your worries and the next best step for you.

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