Looking for info and SUPPORT

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Long but i need help/advice BADLY. 7 years ago at 21 i was told I had a minor pelvic prolapse due to a trumatic labor and delivery. No treatment or advice was given and i was sent on my way. About 3 years and 2nd child after that the pain during sex and everyday pressur and buldging became unbarable. They put me on antidepressents saying i just didnt want to have sex and was exaggerating. 1.5 year ago things got really bad for me and something very small and painful was protruding from my vagina at all times. They sent me to phsyical therapy and said it was my urethra. They did not tell me what type or degree of prolapse. I see online there is multiple. They did tell me after months of therapy it wasnt working, i had nerve damage and loss of feeling which is probably why i often do kegales incorrectly i cant feel or control the muscle. Sent me on my way. Now, i am pregnant with 3rd child. The pain is extreme. Sorry to be graphic but all of these things are hanging out of my vagina, i cry every day and i havent been able to have intercourse in almost 2 months. I dont know whats hanging out, but its like strings/loops and a buldge. It is all so raw. Im scared somehow the loop will tear (like when you rip an earring down ) in half. I dread bowel movments and hold them in because more and more things fall out and it becomers more and more painful. I can shove some back inside , the rest remains. (Mostly its these strings and loops that remain) but after walking and standing all day it all shifts out and i have to reinsert it.

Obgyn has not given me any internal exams. I asked them to at 33 weeks because the prolapse pain and he refused and joked about old women that come in swaying between the knees , basically said its not that bad, and there is no help for pregnant women anyway just do kegals. I do kegals. Hundrends and hundreads of effing Keagles. And i dont find any of this funny. Im actually incredibly embarrassed, depressed, worried, and in pain but glad you think its an effing riot!!!! I need to know whats hanging out of me , any ideas ???????? Are there any support groups for this ???? I think this may be a uk group and i am in usa , not sure if it matters. How do you get a dr to listen ????? Am i at risk to infection with all of this hanging out of me (very concerning being pregnant)? Can/should i still have a vaginal birth??? All questions for a dr that no dr will give me. I dont have the option of changing drs until after delivery due to having a small HMO network and needing local hospital for giving birth next month.

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  • Posted

    Hey lovely, so very sad to hear about the insensitive and rubbish care you have been getting to date.

    I truly hope you are able to find a health practitioner who will be of help to you. I am not sure of the process in the USA, there are some ladies on here from USA and I hope they will be able to make some useful suggestions.

    This is a great forum. Sending love and hugs down the airwaves X 

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  • Posted

    My goodness! Bless your heart. I'm not a doctor or nurse but if it were me I'd go to a UroGynecologist. Even my general practice MD would recognize that you have prolapse and need help. I just had the surgery and had three opinions before having it. I felt like you did and had my cervix falling out. You can't function properly and apparently it happens rather randomly to all ages. Mine happened years after having my kids, but a friend of mine said hers prolapsed right during delivery. I would not let your doctor get by with saying something so degrading. Many women do live with it until it gets worse and they can't. I hope this helps you some. I'm in USA, too, and am 6 1/2 weeks it's surgery. You need help from a caring professional. Not sure what they can do since you're pregnant. You will be in my prayers.

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  • Posted

    No doctor has any right to joke about something like this.

    It's obviously deeply worrying for you, especially when you are pregnant.

    It sounds like some kind of prolapse, and the obgyn should be able to see this without doing an internal.

    Can you ask your Dr to refer you to a different obgyn?

    Or would you be able to afford a one off private consultation with a different one.

    I'm in the uk and know things are different in the US but that's what I would do.

    You need someone to tell you what on earth is going on, and also to put your mind at rest about giving birth vaginalky.

    Look up the term pudendal nerve, that causes the feeling that something is bulging out,many burns like hell when having a bowel movement, combined with a prolapse, maybe this is what you have, the nerve can be damaged by a traumatic birth, and it's difficult to diagnose.

    You sound in a terrible state, and.it can't be good for you, the baby and your other children.x.

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  • Posted

    I presume you are in the US so it will be difficult for any of us in the UK to give medical/surgical advice as procedural things will be different but here in the UK you wouldn't have even got to this stage. There's no way you should have a vaginal delivery and as a midwife (a long time ago) I would challenge any obstetrician who said you can! What is a HMO network? 

    I don't think you're at risk of infection unless you have an open wound and your baby will be well protected by the liquor around him/her.

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