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Loss of confidence

Posted , 9 users are following.

carol38467
carol38467

i would like to know if anyone else has lost their confidence.  I am now 18 weeks post tkr and have been driving and going out with my friends and family but just want to stay at home rather than get out by myself.  I used to go on holiday by myself but cant book one now and would like to be in the sun with all of this snow and ice.

carol scotland

1 like, 45 replies

45 Replies

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  • jean95756
    jean95756 carol38467

    Posted

    hi Carol

    i thought it was just me that had lost their confidence

    this Op has caused me to be a shrinking violet instead of the happy go lucky person I was before.

    i hate limping and having to use a stick ...I feel as if everyone's staring at me....although they probably have much better things to do.

    i used to like my holidays abroad and would always go around February time to get away from this cold weather.

    but this year I don't even want to go out of the house let alone go abroad.

    hopefully one day I will get back to being my old self and start lazing in the Sun againbiggrin

    Jean 

  • gloria29023
    gloria29023 carol38467

    Posted

    Apart from being the worst operation it is a very humbling experience. If you have always been independent and a bit of a go getter, you suddenly find that you are unable to be the same  person and not just for a few weeks more like months and months. It also teaches you a lot about yourself, how it will be when you are really old and truly handicapped and also much about who your friends are. My TKRs have changed me inside that's for sure. Good luck , we will get there.
    • jean95756
      jean95756 gloria29023

      Posted

      I guess I'm one of the Really Old (76) but definitely not in my head....it's just the body misbehaving..
    • carol38467
      carol38467 jean95756

      Posted

      I am 63 and have been retired 1 year but not enjoyed that yet.  I had planned to do so many things.  I need that energy back!
    • Tucks
      Tucks gloria29023

      Posted

      Your words are so wise and very, very true from tucks 6months and counting the days, weeks, when I will be myself again.
  • susan20089
    susan20089 carol38467

    Posted

    I know exactly how you feel. Eight weeks and I haven't attempted the car yet (right knee Tkr).  I am fed up with not being able to go out when I want to. Still using stick to walk outside.  I retired Friday without even returning to work.  I find I don't even want to exercise at the moment either as I have been unwell with cold and cough.  I seem to have no energy at the moment either.  My leg has gone back to hurting a lot behind the knee.  I want to go on holiday as I am always away somewhere warm this time of tear but I feel a bit of a liability at the moment.  Physio did say this is not the best time of year to have this op and she is right.  Let's all hope we feel differently soon.  Sorry I sound miserable, can't cheer you up I am afraid Carol xx
    • Yorkyrebel
      Yorkyrebel susan20089

      Posted

      Susan:  Funny to hear you say about the time of year.  My PT here said the same thing.  When I scheduled this (11-24-14) I thought it would be a perfect time.  That way I would be up and around by Spring and Summer.  Didn't think about the cold dreary weather.  Oh well, it's done now.  
  • suzanne64053
    suzanne64053 carol38467

    Posted

    Hi Carole, I had myTNR in Sept 2014 and am 61. I lost my confidence with driving but now I am back to work, albeit a phased return, it is gradually coming back which is good as I do 50 miles daily .  Like you I find it an effort to get out there again and I have several trips to London booked but I am not looking forward to them. I am struggling with work at present even on the phased return as it makes me so tired.  I think we have all been through a major procedure and the body takes a while to repair itself and not just the knee :-).  I know each day I can do a little more than the day before and I am sure as each day passes our confidence will grow as well.
    • carol38467
      carol38467 suzanne64053

      Posted

      mine was in Sept too.  I think it is lack of knowing people who have had the operation to talk to.  This forum is great but in my own friends Intry to put on a jolly face.
    • suzanne64053
      suzanne64053 carol38467

      Posted

      Yes, I agree. I  think in my case although I am doing everything e.g. Stairs, cycling, driving because my knee is still swollen people can see I am not quite there yet and have  been very sympathetic, and my employers as well. My GP said it can take up to a year for the swelling to go.  A work colleague who had a TKR  several years ago and is extremely happy said he felt it was  between a year or two that he felt he was back to previous fitness. Having said that he is a real fan of TKR and would have the other one done at the drop of a hat if he developed arthritis in the other one :-)
  • EileenH
    EileenH carol38467

    Posted

    I think that is something that happens with any major health problem, surgery or not. Many of the ladies who have the same arthritis as me say the same thing, that condfidence is a problem. I sort of half want to get back to skiing - but my husband won't come with me and it means being out alone. That in itself isn't a problem, I find plenty of people to chat to while up the mountain, especially on the lifts/in the cafes. But at the back of my mind lurks this "What if..."
    • EileenH
      EileenH carol38467

      Posted

      I haven't had a TKR Carol - I have had knee surgery but 20 years ago and that was why I got involved with one of the other threads.

      What I meant was that it isn't just having had a TKR that leads to the loss of confidence. I spent 3 weeks in hospital nearly 3 years ago having my atrial fibrillation sorted out, it isn't a problem now. Doing things I was happily doing up until then (including skiing) have seemed like mountains to climb ever since. I was back to driving as soon as I came out of hospital, there was no reason not to, but although I love driving there was something there that inhibited me going far on my own. I think it took the best part of 18 months before I got back to "normal". But there are still things that feel "too much".

    • carol38467
      carol38467 EileenH

      Posted

      It is such a difficult journey.  I am going to see strictly ballroom, a hobby I loved.  Oh well I can dream.
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