Low tolerance to competition, critique and job stress

Posted , 2 users are following.

Hi ladies, since the last year I can hardly cope with competition and critique that come with my job. I am good at what I am doing, but the job in general is competitive and there is also "the public" who is nowadays critical. I am naturally introverted, but I learned to be extroverted and optimistic in my job.

Now, in the peri, and especially since the last year, i am very very oversensitive to any sign of criticism, anything like "unfavorable" public opinion etc. I do not know how to cope. Have no strategy at all. I do not want to leave my job, and I am good at it, but this is all very painfull and I feel "harmed" most of the time. I feel like a teenage girl, rejected and crying in the corner. Anybody with similar experience?

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7 Replies

  • Posted

    Yes, my situation is almost identical.  I hope to figure out a coping strategy because I am my sole support and have been in my job for many years.  Do you also find that you have serious trouble with getting up in the morning?
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    • Posted

      Thanks Liz, I cannot say serious trouble, but I do not feel well in the morning. It is probably due to night sweating , I still have it, however not so heavy as before, I usually wake up physically "beaten". I need water, coffee and hot shower to get ready.

      As for the job, i have seen some women around 50, 55 to leave the job "out of the blue " or due to some petty silly quarrels. I have always wondered why, and now I understand. The feeling of not fitting in, being "old", obsolete is terrible. It is irrational, because I am quite successful, it is all in my head.

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    • Posted

      I understand.  I am the oldest staff member in my immediate group and it's hard to feel relevant anymore.  My supervisor is helping me get training in another area in our department where I can hopefully get a job sometime if there's an opening, and the mix of age and experience in that group would be a much better fit.  Like you said, it is all in my head - I can succeed in either group - but the age thing has become a big deal, and like you, I see why older coworkers leave or move to other positions.  It's hard when you feel like you don't fit in anymore.

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    • Posted

      Dear Liz, that is true. I am also oldest in my department. My colleagues are 30 to 35 years of age. They could be my kids. I like their energy, they are hardworking and full of new ideas, but sometimes it is too much. Everything "new" is really NEW for them, but I have seen "new" so many times before, and because I am not excited from everything "new" as they are, I am afraid THEY might think I am "old". It is stupid, I know.

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    • Posted

      Hi Lena, I have just walked out of my job. There was a petty quarrel but my emotional health was shot. I couldn't stop crying for days and just walked out. At the time I was on week 3 of Elleste Duet - the first two weeks I had felt a lot better - not tearful as I had been for months and definitely more resilient. Then as soon as I started taking the progesterone the bad mood and tearfullness came flooding back. Now back on the oestrogen part of the HRT and feeling much better again mood wise - but too late for me as I no longer have a job. I was extremely down 2-3 weeks ago and considered 'no longer being here' but thankfully I am. Have had daily headaches that painkillers don't touch - the type of headache I used to get years ago before a period but this one has lasted 5 weeks! (I had been on a contraceptive for many years which didn't give me periods). So my mood is more positive at moment but I have a banging headache and no job smile

       

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    • Posted

      Same here!  I'm working mostly with a mix of young adults and college students.  I believe that there is room for both old and new, so to speak, and some of them really can't relate.  We are who we are and I do my best, but the generation gap gets a little wider every year.  I worry a lot that they see me as old and irrelevant.

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    • Posted

      Dear Jenny, i hope you feel better. I do not know your current situation and I do not know if leaving your job is good or not, but I understand the inner turmoil you probably feel. And I definitely understand the physical aspect of the peri/meno, the pain and general feeling of not-being-well. Young people do not know. I also did not know. It is everyday struggle with headaches, cramps, pain all over the body, nausea etc.etc. And under this situation everybody believes one has to be cheerful, optimistic , fit-in. That is the diference between me and my young colleauges. As for the "job", I can beat everybody of them, but not in the generale "attitude" now.

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