Menopause Hell, Please Help....

Posted , 9 users are following.

Hi all,

I am having the hardest saddest time, my daily life now, and for a very long time has become devastating, and i honestly do not know how to cope,

sever migraines, severe muscle/bone pain, numb hands and feet, chronic flu like symptoms daily, vision problems, severe tinitus, uncontrollable sobbing, chronic fatigue, palpitations, breathlessness, dizzyness, actual stroke like symptoms with twitching and speech problems, (not all the time) I have just started taking menopace plus, but such a bad headache, will it improve once tablets are really in system? does anyone recommend anything better, been advised against hrt, because of family history! this started many years ago at age 29 with hysterectomy, but would come and go,, but now age 49 its so severe, and this is now my life daily, weight gain, even though i eat such small amounts, as no taste buds, or appetite! was such a happy go lucky lady, enjoyed life to the full, wonderful family, children, granchildren, but i have cut off from everyone as feel so so unwell all the time, so sad, so lonely, and so afraid of these hofficfic feelings,,,, any help, guidance, friendly words, would be so much appreciated. xxx

0 likes, 13 replies

13 Replies

  • Posted

    Hey Mandy I relate to how you feel so much. I have to say you are an incredibly strong person to have been dealing with this for so long. I've been struggling for the past two years also with a multitude of horrific sypmtoms and going to great extremes every day to try and deal with them...also have isolated myself as feel like all I have to contribute is how rotten I feel.. used to socialise all the time I loved to go out and live life to the full...but steadily I don't get invited to occasions any more. About 6 months ago I started taking bio identical hormones. .this helped me with hot flushes and insomnia but not all the other stuff. I continously try new foods herbs teas and try and do relaxing things like meditation yoga sauna walking which help some days or for a period but will still go trough bad bouts like today just feel rotten in every way. I just wanted you to know you are not alone, I totally understand and truly wish you strength through this, surely the end is near for you after such a long time. It really doesn't help that really we should be totally slowing down and resting through this period in our lives but most of us still have so much to do, work family etc in this weakened state, it's no wonder we feel rotten! Take care lovely xxx

  • Posted

    hi, i understand the horrible time you are going through as I have gone through all of this.  You say that you are 49 now (I am 48) and that these really bad symptoms started recently?  Mine started bad in 2015 and I had months of these awful symptoms but they have improved but I am still searching for a solution to ease it all as I do still get bad bouts, sometimes for a few months at a time but with good months in between.  I just don't want this pattern to go on and on as I don't know when it will end and I definitely don't want to wait it out without help now.  I think a year and a half is enough!  All I can say is that I tried Menopace Plus for a couple of months (during the really bad stage) and I felt it did NOTHING to help me. In fact, I probably felt worse but you just can't tell what works.  Some people have had good results with it, I didn't.  I tried all the vitamins etc., suggested and in the end, just stopped them all.  I had a blood test for Vitamin D and found to be deficient (was not surprised as I was so unwell, I was unable to enjoy the sunshine and get it naturally) and this supplement is the only one I take and it definitely improved a lot of things, it is worth a try for you too. (Now perhaps my body was just improving also, but it does so much good for your body, so worth a try).  I think it is no matter that you had a hysterectomy in the past, it is your ovaries that are giving up on you now.  I know you said you are worried about hrt, I am too, but for us group of women who suffer like this, I think we really need to discuss the benefits of it for a short time because the alternative is the poor quality of life we are having now with no end in sight!.  I have some great months now, but when my system crashes again, I fear it will go on for years and years.  It's a full time job trying to keep a balance with diet and exercise, almost a military exercise, and it is do-able for a while, for example, I begin to have dizzy spells or another weird symptom if I have something to eat or drink that I shouldn't.  I can stick to a healthy diet most of the time, but I do want to enjoy the not so healthy things at times too.  My body is not allowing me to do that.  So now, having gone through another dip for the last month, I am going to see what I can take now for quality of life.  I hope this helps you, feeling unwell all the time is no fun at all.  x

    • Posted

      Hi Sweetheart,

      Thank you so much for your reply and words, hrt is a no go for me. as family history ect, i have been advised against it, so everything i have to go through is so frightening, as i do not know what to do for the best? I do believe to walk or exercise is great, but on the other hand when i cant stand up, or have no balance, or like the migraine,,, severe migraine i have had now for 3 days, well i can just about lift my head or open my eyes, thats when it is near impossible to get out! I have to have my mammogram tomoz, absolutly dreading it, purely because of my poor boobs are so swollen, hot, sore, another horrid symptom! i think the hardest thing for me, is i look so different, i do actually look terminally ill! thats what devastates me, as i have changed so much... Sweetheart, all i can say is thank you for talking, sharing your journey with me, I hope things of course get better for you, and of course please stay in touch as so lovely to not feel so alone... big hugs... xxxxx

    • Posted

      you are very welcome!  best of luck for the mammogram.  I've had one of those also!!  Never ending....  but here's hoping! 

  • Posted

    Hi Mandy

    I'm so sorry! I'm 51 years old now but looking back 49 was the worst for me as well! Reading your message felt like I wrote it!!!

    Like you I have a wonderful husband children and grandchildren and yet felt I was going through hell and alone! Headaches for days at the time!! Waking in the middle of the night scared for me and my family!! Crying and still do, not as often but I miss the old me ! I use to laugh and I was so social and happy and I'm not sure who I am anymore!

    But it's been about 6 months now that alots of these symptoms are gone!! I have 2 that I'm dealing with right now body aches and the anxiety every couple of days..you will be fine! Everytime crazy thoughts will take over, I will pick up my book.I use to read at least 4 books a week! Around that time went to chiropractor and he was the one who told me to take Vitamin D daily and I will see improvement and sure well if I miss a few days I start feeling lousy again!! Please don't give up! It will get better soon! Lots of hugs your waysmile

    • Posted

      Hi Darling,

      Thank you so much for your words, i know nothing can make these terrifying symtoms pass quickly, but it helps so much to hear that i am not alone in all this, it really took over my life, like i said first little things from age of 29 with hysterectomy, but honestly this last couple of years really, its been a downward spiral, leading to the last month of sheer hell... but again it was so lovely to hear from another lady who actually understands.. thank you so much... hugs back to you.. xxx

    • Posted

      You welcomesmile I wish I had found this site 6 years ago when all this craziness had started it would of saved me countless trips to ER and drs! My husband is wonderful man but after the 2 years I think he was done listening to me complaining 24/7!!! I never felt so alone!! There were moments I couldn't do it anymore!!! But I know it doesn't help right now but you are going to feel better soon and try vit D if you can...I hate taking pills but I love this onesmile Please write anytimesmile

  • Posted

    I wish I could offer you words of wisdom or advice mandygolf - I truly do. But others on here are so much more knowledgable than me that nothing I could say would be helpful. All I will say is that no-one should have to suffer like this during what is suppose to be a 'normal' occurance in our lives.

    Could you visit another doctor to get a second opinion? Or even an alternative practitioner as they can sometimes be extremely good. I would be willing to try anything if I were in your position to get some relief.

    Stay strong - all this will pass. Big hug to you (((  )))

  • Posted

    Hi Mandy,

    Just remember you are not alone, I would say that everyone goes through all or some of these symptons. I suffered for 4 years and started HRT patches as I was so desperate, i saw that you can't take HRT, but I have to say that today I am lying on the sofa in a dark house as I am so tired and sad so HRT isn't perfect either. 

    Some days I feel a bit like my old self, like you, i was happy go lucky, full of life with a lovely family and a lovely life, I long for those days again and wonder if I will ever feel like me again. I can't make you feel better, but I can sympathise. I feel better when I have been for a walk, no stress no pressure and you feel like you are part of the world. I wish we could all just have a fairy godmother to wave a wand and everything would be back to normal. When you feel awful just remember you are not alone, thousands of women feel exactly the same apparently with time the symptons fade and we feel better so my neighbour has told me and a friend so there is some light at the end of the tunne. Take care. One day at a time.........

     

  • Posted

    I'm now nearly 58 but in 2015 I had been suffering with various menopause symptoms since 2009, nothing too severe just unexplainable symptoms at various times. However in March 2015 I had a knee operation (new plastic knee cap and metal bit that the knee cap runs over). Over the course of the next few months I was very low as the knee operation didnt quite go according to plan and then my menopause symptoms escalated beyond belief.....I felt like a different woman, and not in a good way. I lost over a stone in weight, couldn't eat, was always crying, anxiety levels were HORRENDOUS.....of the 66 symptoms on the menopause list I think I had 60!I even had to give up my job as a PA. In September 2015 my doctor put me on HRT patches, but to no avail. In November 2015 I woke one morning in such a terrible state that I couldn't get out of bed. An emergency appointment with my doctor confirmed that not only was I suffering from the menopause but I was also very depressed. As much as I didn't want to hear this I was then offered antidepressants and very, very reluctantly startedto take them - Sertraline 1 x 50mg a day. I also came off the HRT. For the first five days I wanted to die, but miraculously on the sixth day I woke up feeling more "me". Since that day I've taken one antidepressant every day,and now the only thing I suffer with is occasional hot sweats. Never in this world did I think that menopause would be this awful, I turned into a woman I didn't recognise, wouldn't go out of the house, look after my granddaughter, even speak to people somedays. It was very very frightening andyou begin to wonder when, if ever, you are going to return to the woman you once were! If it hadn't have been for the support of my wonderful husband and family I honestly don't know how I would have got through it. For many women they probably wouldn't want to go down the route of antidepressants, but I can honestly say they worked for me and if I have to take one little tablet for the rest of my days then bring it on! Life is too short to feel so crap all the time!

    • Posted

      Hi Darling,

      Thank you for responding, even though i have had bouts of being seriously unwell, since my hysterectomy at the age of 29, this last year has just got worse and worse, now to where, honestly i do not know what to do, yes i completely know i have of course got so desperatly low with it all, but the reason for that is because i feel like i am dying, with every single day getting worse! I cannot even talk to anyone, i rarely go out now, and i have totally lost the lady that i was, now at nearly 50, my life, well its not a life, i just about exist... I would have no problem with antidepressents , i literally would do anything, i have been on a couple of them before, sadly though its even tougher for me as i experience such awful side effect from even antibiotics! one of those people who really gets affected from pills, so that frightens me as well...I do have wonderful children and grandchildren, but sadly i do not know how to be around them, as i do not even look the same, in fact i look desperatly ill, so i do not want their lives to suffer, with worrying seeing me like this, so i shut myself away, my partner and i split last year, as sadly there are some men out there that will not deal with it, as i was the one that kept everything together, but sadly i couldnt anymore! I honestly feel the lowest i thought i could ever get, and full of despair,, i go back to my doctors on tuesday, and i honestly will be begging for something, as i now know i just cannot cope with feeling this ill, thank you darling for your words, i am so very pleased your light came back for you... much love.. xxx

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