Mind still not right citalopram

Hi Gary,

I just read your description of whats happening in your life right now and all the questions you raised inside your head that you seek answers too.

Let me re assure you that you have done the right thing and spoken so openly and bravely about the way it is in your mind and how your body is reaction as well.

All of you say is most identifiable to most of us in here and you are nothing out of the ordinary.

I want to re assure you , your not going mad, I have told myself this many times, and the way I look at it now is to say back to those thoughts , It is a lie , I am not who my thoughts say I am.

It is ok to have those thoughts , its not ok when we allow those thoughts to actively break us apart and rip into our soul and be convinced that these negative thoughts must be true.

Forget what others may say about you as they have no chance to understand what your anxiety is doing to your mind ,body and soul.

It is not important what others may say, I have been hurt at times when people who dont know me have saud cruel things about me.

I walk away and bring myself back to the truth about me.

Like yourself I to suffer the mixture of depression and anxiety.

They are both quite different in terms of how they affect me and bind me up to rob me of having a fulfilling day, week ,year and more.

Suicidal thoughts , I have had many and yes have gone as far as attempting to take my own life, but this too is something I cannot see myself ever wanting to take part in as I have learned that these are thoughts that come into my head and like all these other thoughts I am having about myself, I have the choice to own them or to rebuke them and tell them to leave my thought pattern in my head and to cast them out as a lie, which essentially what these thoughts are to me today.

Its natural for anyone to look to the easy way out of situations but having lived with depression all through different periods  my life and to of had 3 years of living with acute anxiety I am learning slowly to hold on to the truth about me and who I really am.

Try to say to yourself lots of good positive things .

if you cant say them then write them down and keep adding to the list as you find another positive thought enters your head and also when others mention those great trates about your write them down too.

I spend 12 months waking up in the morining after a long 8 years of living in shocking depression due to the sudden death of my loving partner and during this recovery time it was important for me to wake up go to the bathroom wash my face and look intoi the mirror and begin to say to myself," your all right "- your one of the good guys- i like what I see in you - and eventually I was able to bring myself to actually say with complete sincereity hey Mr " I love you ".

I say , know who you are , and learn to really love yourself , and dont be afraid by those thoughts that come into your head that tell you your no good or your mad and need to be put away .

Stick with what you know now, and that is as I have come to understand over the past 4 weeks that I have a route os escape from these feelings that want to destroy me and that is found by logging onto this chat and discussion forum where I am fully understood by others and be re assured you are by no means alone.

Feel the strength of others response as you write away and tell others how it is .

And be encouraged to help another in here.

And this is something which will help you begin to see hope and light.

In regard to your meds , different things work for different people, find what works for you.

I myself have been on prozac for several years for the depression and will probably remain on them for a long time yet.

In regards to my anxiety I have other meds to take but for me meds are meds , they dont take my anxiety away , they just supress it .

I send you hugs and love and encourage you to have a wonderful day where you can find some peace and calmness to all your tormoil.

PJ

Hello Gary,  Can i ask what dosage of Citalopram you are on.  3 weeks is still quite early for the body to stabilise.  I was started on 20mg and my anxiety increased,  so with the GP advice i went down to 10mg.  I stayed on this dosage and found that my anxiety came down immediately.  I have only had a couple of panic attacks in 11 months now.  Anxiety is almost gone and is hardly there now and my depression is controlled so that i can now enjoy things again. As for being sectioned you will only be sectioned if your a danger to yourself or others, so need to worry on that score,  it's your anxiety that is talking.  I would ring your surgery tomorrow and ask for a GP to call you back and have a word about how your feeling on Citalopram.  I asked my GP if i could reduce my dose and have been fine since.  I would hang on for another 3 weeks and i am sure you will see the benefits.  I would rather not be on meds, but find that the 10mg keeps me ticking over.  Please try to do something to take your mind off the anxiety. Try deep breathing, if you can go for a walk, try to distract yourself from your thoughts, hard i know but it can work.  Hope this helps.

Elizabeth.  

I agree with ozzie i suffer from anxiety and depression and have thoughts i just try shake them off your not a bad person anxiety picks on the stuff that knows gets to you the most it's an horrible illness i wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy i was on the tablets your on but didn't work for me made me think even more infact but everyone different really hope you feel better soon x