My ex is suffering from depression and anxiety

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I'm hoping that someone can help me through this or guide me in the right direction. 

I'm not quite sure how to start this story but hopefully the important elements will be said. 

I met my best friend/lover/ex 4 years ago. We've always had an amazing chemistry with each other. To be honest, he's the love of my life. My soul has ever felt at home with another human being until I met him. I've been in love with him for the last 3 years and he loves me, too, but has been fighting many demons for the last 3 years his life. In December 2017 we had finally made it official and we were the happiest, or so it seemed. After 4 years of knowing each other he introduced me to his family on Christmas and his parents love me so much. I can't explain how well he treated me and how good he was to me, but no one has ever been as loving and caring as he was to me.. Everything was going beyond well, we were both so happy. In January of this year he started talking about the future and how when he saves enough money he will get me a promise ring and we were just really talking and planning the future.. Then after 2 weeks out of nowhere he started distancing himself away and being cold to me. Then one day before Valentine's day he broke up with me but begging for us to stay best friends as we were before because he couldn't see a life without me in it.. So now we're friends again and I just came back from seeing him today and he told me that he went to a gp and was diagnosed with anxiety & depression... I wanted to know are these actions a reflection to depression and anxiety? And how is the best possible way to be there for him?

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  • Posted

    medicine should be LAST resort.. 

    let us have patience.. and build/repair our brain .. the way it should be done..

    some caring people are very 'sensitive' and they become anxious about loved ones..

    so both of you have to have faith in creator and not be unduly anxious about each other.. of course being caring is very good..

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  • Posted

    First of all you need to make him open up to you

    ( make yourself that you know excatly whats going on with him)

    tell him STRAIGHT 

    "Are You depressed????"

    "Are you worried??"

    "do you have anxiety from future?"

    put your hand on his cheek to comfort him 

    (try to kiss his forehead) (a great way to show respect)

    " well i know how much its hard to think about the future , i know youre heart broken even though youre really sweet and kind but wont you give yourself another chance???"

    "wont you give our love another chance?"


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  • Posted

    Hello Lissa. I am sure it was a shock to be rocking along in a very happy relationship and all of a sudden your bf wants to break up. I am so sorry. Your story is a familiar one on this forum. As to whether or not the cause is depression and anxiety or not I cannot say. You have to be grieving and that seems appropriate to me. I wish I had the answer but I don't. Please use us as a support system we will be here for you. Diane

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    • Posted

      Hi Adriane,

      honestly it was one of the most difficult times in my life. I've been through worse but when he broke up I felt like I lost a piece of me and lost my best friend although he wanted me to stay in his life. We stayed on the phone for over 3 hours when he broke up with me. He told me "we're talking about the future, rings, babies, and it scares me off" (yet I'm not the one who brought up the future because I know men get scared about these talks) he told me he didn't feel the fire between us anymore (which really made no sense because we were so happy and everything was going well in all aspects) when I asked why does he feel that way and what changed he told me "I really don't know why and what changed it just did". As I said before he's been fighting a lot demons in his life.  He does not have his life together and is only now trying to get on his feet while I am studying law and will be graduating next year. We are 27-29. He always says I'm too good for him and that he's just bringing me down and holding me back when it's not that at all. I don't care what illness he has I want to stick by him through everything but I don't know how since he broke up with me... I'm not sure why he's scared, I've been here through all his downfalls and never left his side

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