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My IBS A Poem

Posted , 2 users are following.

fiona51388
fiona51388

Hopefully this little ode will amuse and not offend anyone..

My IBS

I am sufering from

A feeling of hollowed out bum

My rectum is a stretched 'em

And I'm feeling slightly ill

I think I need that man from Rent'A'Kill

For things will not be still

I must rectify this situation

A feeling of the utmost constipation

And things altogether too slimy to mention

To say nothing of the stench'em

I'm rapidly losing strength'em

WON'T SOMEONE JUST GO GET A GUN AND SHOOT ME!!

I think humour often goes some way to alleviating pain, so this is with this in mind, I am a published poet, my paperback book is called Myriads - Fiona Josa Phoenix and I am also currently on you tube with Poetry from Myriads - Fiona Josa Phoenix, if you will forgive me a little plug there, many thanks and keep well everyone ;-)

1 like, 15 replies

15 Replies

  • philippa61759
    philippa61759 fiona51388

    Posted

    Very well done indeed!  It certainly helps to take away any attendant worries many of us have with IBS.  I am a published poet too and my first book is called 'Lyrical Musings' which you can google.  I didn't expect to find a fellow poet here.  How lovely.  Perhaps you could tell me how to upload videos on YouTube; I've been meaning to do the same myself.
    • fiona51388
      fiona51388 philippa61759

      Posted

      Hello fellow poet, very pleased to meet you. Is your book available from Amazon? 're the video for you tube I got help from an IT expert and couldn't retrace the steps he took, sorry can't be of more help , with best wishes x
    • fiona51388
      fiona51388 philippa61759

      Posted

      Phillips, I love contemporary poetry so have just bought your book, I'm sure I'll enjoy it.
  • philippa61759
    philippa61759 fiona51388

    Posted

    You can find my book on Amazon either as a physical book or an ebook.  I will have a look at YouTube to see if I can figure out uploading videos.  If not I will ask my dad who is considerably more technical than me.  The first step is to practice videoing myself on my ipad;  that should be amusing.  I wonder how many takes I'll need!
  • philippa61759
    philippa61759 fiona51388

    Posted

    Thank you so much; hope you enjoy it!
    • fiona51388
      fiona51388 philippa61759

      Posted

      I hope your Dad can help you, my nephew does much of my tech, bless him. Oh, if you like photography, Phillipa, my book also contains a photographic interlude as that's another of my hobbies x
  • philippa61759
    philippa61759 fiona51388

    Posted

    Just bought your poetry collection 'The Songbook'.  I also looked at your video which great.  I loved you talking to the interviewer with a glass of wine in your hand!
    • fiona51388
      fiona51388 philippa61759

      Posted

      Oh thanks! I hope you enjoy it. Yes the interviewer was Michael White, who also uploaded it for me x
  • philippa61759
    philippa61759 fiona51388

    Posted

    I've just read 'The Songbook'; it was delightful.  Are you on Facebook or could I contact you by email to share my latest poems? I have put some of my contributions on Facebook.
    • fiona51388
      fiona51388 philippa61759

      Posted

      Hi Phillipa, yes, just look for Fiona Field, or if you can't find me I'll message you my email add, very best wishes to you. PS .I'm waiting for your book in the post, it's due today.
  • philippa61759
    philippa61759 fiona51388

    Posted

    I found your Facebook page and sent a friend request.  Happy reading when my book comes!
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