My life is full of bad decisions chasing happiness

Posted , 7 users are following.

For years I've been in constant pursuit of happiness and I've always fallen short. It has led to a string of bad decisions. I cant seem to find contentment. Im very lucky compared to a lot of other people and feeling this way just compounds my s****y disposition - I feel selfish and ungrateful. People seem to think highly of me until they get to know me better and realize what a complete f**k up I am. Gradually Ive withdrawn from meeting people. Now it just seems like a chore. It affects my personal and professional relationships to a point where I just feel they're better off without me - I always end up with this conclusion. Ive been pursuing happiness since I can remember and in that pursuit I've made so many bad decisions. I just cant seem to get it right. Now Im just tired. I want this to end. I have fatalistic thoughts that I'd just die and be done with it. Im not suicidal, but disappearing forever seems like a good idea.

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6 Replies

  • Posted

    Pursuing happiness is common. We all as human beings want to be happy. But one thing we have to warn our is happiness isn't last long. Sadness is waiting to come to us anytime. So, we have to understand this point. You said you've made so many bad decisions it doesn't mean that you don't have chance to make anything right.  SOMETIMES IT SEEMS LIKE THERE IS NO PLACE FOR ONE BUT I BELIEVE SINCE ONE WAS BORN, THE WORLD ACCEPT YOU. 

    With love smile

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  • Posted

    Hi happiness comes if you do what you want to in your life and are fulfilled.  It doesn't come as a permanent state of mind but you have to be in a certain state before you can see it.  It can be the smile or a child, a lovely sunny day,  being with the one you love etc. 

    Happiness is living the life you want to live and not one dictated by others or society.  Try pursuing this instead and you will find contentment.  x

     

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  • Posted

    Hi yuri I so agree with Hypercat! Chasing happiness never works we have to find our place our comfort zone whether is a job that fits us not what we think others think we should do! Allowing nature to take its course in our life allowing a relationship to happen naturally with friends or love.  Hope this makes sense. Please let us know what you think how you are. We care we are here!! Diane
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  • Posted

    Hi. it doesn't matter how lucky you think you are compared to others. The way you feel can't be helped It's all relative. I know exactly what you're saying about fatalistic thoughts and people being better without you. I often think this at dark times. Feel free to message me anytime though. Like minded souls can often understand more....

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  • Posted

    Hi yuri how are you feeling about our input? Is it helping some is some of it making sense? I think staying in the mainstream here on the site and get several opinions is a great idea and benefits me the most😊  We care. We want to hear back from you! Diane

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  • Posted

    Hi Yuri - chasing something makes it more elusive. Are you projecting your thoughts of yourself onto others - looking for words, interactions and/or events to justify what you are feeling? Yes, people are a chore, but they can also be the reward. You are not a f**k up. Would you consider some counselling to help understand yourself and what is happening to you? 
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