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Need reassurance

Posted , 6 users are following.

laurie12351
laurie12351

Hi all, 

Having another bad day. Anxiety, depression, shakey, nausea and have been having suicidal thoughts. Day 13 on Prozac. I know I have a long way to go but I just feel so alone and scared and unsure and doubtful. I hate feeling and sounding weak but here I am. I'm so thankful for all the support I get from everyone on this site. I don't think I would be able to make it without all of you. 

Thank you for helping and being there for me.

Laurie

1 like, 17 replies

17 Replies

  • angie_38564
    angie_38564 laurie12351

    Posted

    Hi Laurie

    I started my medz in march, I was very ill, bad thoughts, sucidal and not sure if I could carry on, now I am enjoying my life now, and back to old myself! I had depression and anxiety so bad, I lost 3 stone in 12 weeks as I was so ill, at one point I considered be sectioned ! Please hang on in there, I never really believed it when ppl on the forum told me I would get better, but here I am smile this forum was a lifeline for me, this illness is evil, but you can and will get better....anytime you want to talk message me if you want, hold on in there 🙏🏽🙏🏽??

    • laurie12351
      laurie12351 angie_38564

      Posted

      Thank you so much Angie. I needed  some positive input. It's hard day after day to keep going. I have spent most of today crying. My son gets married in 5 weeks and I feel just horrible going through this at this time. 

      Im not much good to any of my family right now. 

      Your support means a lot.  I will keep trying to hold on.

      Thank you

      Laurie

    • angie_38564
      angie_38564 laurie12351

      Posted

      I was very fearful of attending gatherings and would shut out the world from the moment I woke up, hopefully the meds will work for you within the five weeks, it actually worked quicker than I was told it would, keep the faith, I spent a lot of time praying, you will be okay, I'm Testimony to it....🙏🏽😘

  • isiao
    isiao laurie12351

    Posted

    Laurie,

    You are at the begining of this road. Hang in there and it will be better before you know it. 

    It is tough to think you are worse off before you get better. Try to find things that will make you feel a little better. Hot tea, walk (I do have to force myself to get out), and meditation help me. I found this app called Smiling Mind, it is free and it teaches you how to meditate. It is a great help for me!

    Again, hang in there and you can overcome this! Take care!

    Iris

    • laurie12351
      laurie12351 isiao

      Posted

      Thank you Iris for the kind words of support. I will look into that app.

      Hopefully that will help some.

      Take care

      Laurie

  • Guest
    Guest laurie12351

    Posted

    Hi Laurie , I'd keep going if I were u ! I am done say 25 today and today's the first day so far I have had happy periods of enjoyment for life which feel amazing ! My anxiety is still severe chronic rather but just got this feeling today . Can't pinpoint it ! Ima keep going ! You should too xxx

    • laurie12351
      laurie12351 Guest

      Posted

      OK, I'll keep going. Thanks Spice for being there.

      Laurie

    • isiao
      isiao Guest

      Posted

      Glad to know that you are improving! It is a great feeling to get to a day this this! Good luck to you and wishing things are on the up swing!
  • victoria08223
    victoria08223 laurie12351

    Posted

    Hi Laurie,

    Please stay strong. I KNOW exactly what you are feeling. Let me start out by saying I have a very wonderful life. I've never had problems but for some reason my brain decided to give me anxiety and depression in Novemeber of 2016 and then suicicdal thoughts in December. I was graduating college, moving across counry, and planning a massive wedding. So I'm thinking this is what triggered it. Anyways, I started therapy with no medication and it just wasn't cutting it. I was still have suicidal thoughts. Thoughts killing myself FOR NO REASON. I have a wonderful family! It was killing me... it was literally killing me. So I finally went to my family doctor for medication. She put me on 10mg of Prozac for 5 weeks, (i was terrified of side effects so we decided to start EXTREMLEY slow). It help a little, still had thoughts. Bumped up to 20mg, finally felt some releif for 5 more weeks and WAY less thoughts. I thought this was good enough until I had bad thoughts all Easter weekend with my family (like why?!) so we bumped up to another 10mg =30mg for 4 weeks. This finally pushed me away from the darkness it was like a light almost. But then work is SO STRESSFUL and had my first anxiety attack since January so we moved up to exactly 40mg about two weeks ago. I HAVE NO THOUGHTS! I'm finally feeling normal .No side effects or anything. IT saved me!!!!! YOU HAVE TO STAY STRONG!! THIS WILL WORK. I know how hard it is, triust me. I've been sitting on my couch "watching" (not really watching literally just staring off) a super funny movie with my brother and then the thoughts just consumed me and I was aboustley terrified with myself. Yes, it took a good 6 months to finally be in this position but it was worth it to finally feel normal.... Stay strong. Pray. and I promise it will come.

     

    • laurie12351
      laurie12351 victoria08223

      Posted

      Thank you so very much Victoria. You words of hope help. I just feel like crying all the time. I am so scared but reading all these positive stories helps me to hold on a bit longer. So I read them over and over again.

      thank you for sharing with me. Your kindness touches my heart.

      Thank you

      Laurie

    • laurie12351
      laurie12351 angie_38564

      Posted

      Hi Angie,

      Yes I am starting to see some improvement. Still have anxiety, nausea and shakes in the morning and throughout the day but they are less severe. 

      My evenings are usually calmer. I still have blips but I am just a couple of days shy of 6 weeks. It's still early. I'm going to get there.

      Thank you for asking and thinking of me.

      How are you doing?

    • angie_38564
      angie_38564 laurie12351

      Posted

      Hi Laurie, glad you are improving, as for me, currently having a small blip, apparently this is to be expected during recovery, but so very hard, when you have had your life back, so praying it will nor be for too long.....the good thing is, it is not as bad as before, therefore just an ajustment of the meds.....things will settle for you soon.....X
    • angie_38564
      angie_38564

      Posted

      Its funny, but most people say the eveings are better, i think it becuse you have got through the day, which can be so hard......this illness is the worst, but its comforting to know we are not alone.....X

       

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