Newby

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Hi I have just joined having been diagnosed with genital type 1 only a couple of months ago. There are so many questions to ask and so many emotions I have going on at the moment  but two particularly interest me if anyone could help my knowledge . I am now single  having split from the person who gave me herpes ( not because of this ) .   How frequently on average does type 1 reappear and also what I are peoples experiences of telling new partners ? I dread the thought  and it's eating away at me 

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5 Replies

  • Posted

    Dear Newby,

         It's all a process.  First getting passed the shock of having GH then understanding it.  No one's out breaks are the same so that's really up to you to notice.  Stay as stress free as possible and your out breaks should stay minimal.

          As far as telling partners that has never been easy. There is always going to be that fear of rejection.  In my experience's over the 15+ yrs I've had this, most were OK with it.  I've gone every route blurting it out, emotionally crying it out, telling them after the fact.  It hasn't been easy but I have found that being better prepared for questions and also breaking the news Calmly has had the best results. Either way be prepared for whatever may come. Hope this helped best of luck. 

    • Posted

      Thank you so much for the response . you are right it is a shock. I thought I was coping then suddenly it has hit me that this is something I am always going to have to live with so now I am finding my emotions are reeling . Those friends I have told have been very pragmatic about it but the fear of rejection is strong.  Dating at 50 is hard enough , I feel it has probably just taken on an extra dimension. Still all in good time eh need to sort my head out first . Thank you for the reassurance 
  • Posted

    hi when you find out how to tell a new partner let me know i am in the same boat x
  • Posted

    Hi Vanityfayre. I can't really help you in terms of telling new partners, as I am still with the one who infected me (although that definitely has its own challenges!). However, having been diagnosed around 9months ago now I can advise you in terms of the emotional side.  I was incredibly upset, would cry randomly all the time, and took out my anger on those around me. But I didn't tell anyone so none of my friends and family had any idea what was going on. In terms of this, and accepting the diagnosis I reccomend two things: First of all, get to know your condition. I researched everything I possibly could about the condition and this really helped me out. I also got to know myself with regards to herpes - what made it worse, what made it better. I have found that eating healthily and exercising regularly has greatly improved the frequency of my outbreaks, as well as avoiding tight clothing in warm weather. Second of all: tell someone! Although I talked it over with my partner who infected me, his sense of guilt meant that I didn't want to bring it up often. It was genuinely eating me up inside and was on my mind 24 hours a day. Joining this forum helped, as well as talking to medical professionals. But the best thing that helped was telling my best friend. Find someone you trust not to laugh or judge or scorn and confide in them. 

    I also have type 1. I was told upon diagnosis that this is a milder strain and I should be grateful for that. However, i suffered from very frequent and very painful outbreaks within the first few months (have to be honest with you!). It is likely that thats just me as on the whole, according to my reasearch, type 1 is much better. Now my outbreaks are very infrequent and much less painful than the first one, and without the whole flu-like symptoms too. As far as I'm aware this is much worse in type 2 so do be grateful for this small silver lining. Best of luck with telling new partners x

    • Posted

      Hi thank you for your message and advice . My ex has basically not even acknowledged his part in this  and even accused me of overreacting as I was upset which has made it harder to come to terms with as I had to go through it on my own but I have told a couple of friends and that has helped although I'm still very up and down. I think I keep getting outbreaks but they are very mild . It is good to know they become less frequent with time.   It hellos to know that the emotions I'm going through are the same as others and that I am normal in my reaction . I guess the good thing with type 1 is that if i meet someone who has cold sores on their mouth is that i can't spread it to them so I might not very need to tell them .  

      Im very glad to hear your outbreaks have got less painful and less frequent. Thank you for wishing me luck x

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