No hope!

Hi dondons,

I've been there for 16 years, I've been through a lot, so you may want to read this. I made it through everything and with patience im taking my life back. I'm slowly day by day feeling alive again.

Use this technique. As soon as you start hating yourself about the past. Remember you are now past that, and nothing can be done about what has happened. Notice that harming yourself will add more to the pain of the past. Because tomorrow will come, and you will remember about yesterday. You might have let some chances go, you might have done mistakes, but there is something about life. It isn't about what has happened, and how to undo it. Its about how you dream for it to be, and to work for it to be so. Let all that has happened behind your arms and finally release the burden you have been carrying for a long time i suspect.

Me my friend started having the first depression, when i was just 3. Back then I decided that I was alone and lost the sense of emotion. The emotions I would feel most, were pain and anger. Anger I chose to direct to myself to selfdestruct me, and pain to make others pitty me so that I could get their attention. I failed until some time ago when I almost went crazy. At that moment I said to myself. All of this can't be true, something becomes true when you believe it. So at that moment i stopped believing things would only go wrong for me, and started taking baby steps every day to improve my life. I used this technique, whenever I noticed my blood flowing with anger, I knew soon later would come pain. So i stoped every thought, and started counting from 10 to 1 backwards and I would totally focus on it. That time is enough for you to let your body detach from feelings from the past that used to make you angry, and will make you watch the reality with more clarity.

without wanting to be harsh, u can only help those that are prepared and do so help themselfs, you have many ppl replying to ur posts, dont ever do anything that you promise you wont, cos thats just not right, you obvoiusly need help and seek it, dont tell ppl ur gonna do it, instead calm down count to ten, and notify ppl, that you may do it, and the conversations will be way more pleasant, and calmer,

i have never self harmed, never understood it, didnt know how to feel about ppl that did, when i learnt Princess Diane used to self harm, i was troubled and realised its personal to her confused live she was amidst of, i feel for ppl self harming, for me however, i am extremely suicide, and wanna do something horrific, which wud end my life immediatly, but ive sworn not too, to my doctor whilst under her care, however, i used to binge drink for 17 yrs an the past 6 cant stand the sight of it, nor the smell, its really offputing for me, and i find the appeal to self harming is far greater to drinking again, myself like,