not sure what to do....

Posted , 5 users are following.


i'm really not sure what to do, as you can tell from the title. i've suffered with depression/emotional difficulties since i was very young, and am now in group therapy to help... i'm really self conscious spelling this out but i think it's worth a try..

three months ago my gf ended our two year relationship (after moving in together only 2 months before), and i've had to move back home where i have attachment issues with my mum. i also finished my job and started a new one 6 weeks ago, which includes lots of travelling, working from home, and it is a completely different industry to what i was used to...

safe to say, i'm in a pretty dark place and feel completely hopeless. i'm lost, confused, and feel completely isolated and alone even when i'm with people. the relationship breaking down has opened up lots of wounds from when i was little and i'm struggling to cope with that also.

I loved my gf, very much so, but it too wasn't making me happy, but knowing how i would feel without it, i clung to it. 

i've been on fluoxetine for 3 years, and i also managed to wean myself off of mirtazapine around about 2 months before my gf broke up with me. 

i've tried my hardest to not go back to taking medication, but sort of feel this is my only option now to give myself some hope that things can get better.... 

i hope some of this makes sense, i'm not sure why i am even writing this but it doesn't feel like lots of my friends really understand how i feel, or are particularly sensitive to what i am going through. any advice or support would be greatly received. thank you


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  • Posted

    life is full of ups and downs but when we suffer with depression our downs are head wrecking,it will get better with time you just need to go through the motions as always easier said than done i know,but i know from what im going through that u just have to keep fighting the fight,hope your ok soon
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  • Posted

    Hi there,

    I really feel for you. You have had a lot to cope with, and lots of changes, it is not surprising you are feeling bad at the moment, but it WILL get better. Well done for doing therapy group, I hopeyou get help from this. Don't beat yourself up about aking medication, millions of people on this planet take antidepressants everyday. You are NOT alone, although I know it feels that way at the moment. I don't know how old you are, but please remember antidepressants can sometimes make you feel worse for a couple of weeks before they make yoi feel better. Just remember that things will get better, usually within a couple of months. Any intrusive or dark thoughts are part of the illness , they are NOT you, they aree just thoughts, they will pass, as will your low feelings.

    When you are feeling better you will be able to cope with your new job and will be able to meet someone else and maybe even find somewhere else to live. Remember you will have many good times to look forward to. In the meantime, be kind to yourself. Good luck, I am sure you will be feeling much better soon.

    Best wishes

    Sarah x

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  • Posted


    The break up with your girlfriend, the change of occupation and moving back to a a home where problems arise will all cause problems for you. I do feel however you must still be seeing your GP,

    It seems your personal relationship with your ex was problematic even though you feel the relationship was suspect anyway, if that is the case, to move on sounds the best way forward, as that will allow both of you to approach a more suitable Partnership for you future years. The problems with Partnerships that have had an extended relationship it becomes a habit, with you both going through the motions. My first engagement was very much the same and it eventually failed.

    Your work environment will be challenging you if the work is different and that will take you time to get to grips to this problem, give yourself time and eventually you will get a grip and perform the tasks in an efficient manner.

    Regards your moving back home where you suffer these relation problems will be made worse because you had moved out to live with your past Partner. So possibly there may be a build up of friction between Mother and Son. Personally moving out to a new place may be a good idea and that will give you freedom from your family home.

    You explain you are taking several medications for your Depression and Anxiety and you question if they are worth taking. Only you and your GP can decide if you should take these medications or something else. I would advise your GP and explain your concerns.

    When it comes to friends and even Society in general few really understand the illness, depression. All I will say is you need to be able to mix with those people you used to know. If you tell them of your condition or not is your decision I cannot walk in your shoes.

    If you need to chat, you know where we are, all I will say is give yourself time and do not rush into a new relationship. I may however be a good idea to stand onto your own two feet, that will restrict the stress you may be feeling at home


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  • Posted

    Sorry to hear you're struggling. It's hardly surprising, with all the changes you've been going through!

    There is no shame in going back in meds, in fact, meds + therapy is a good strategy. It doesn't have to be forever.

    Think a trip to the doctor to discuss your options is in order.

    Hope you start to feel better soon xx

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