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I had a horrible scarring panic attack by myself twice while smoking a blunt. One by myself and the other with 3 friends. Mid-September I had rolled up a blunt by myself and was ready for it be another stress-deleted day from work when it really was the opposite. I had brought my sisters beat headphones and my rolled up blunt into my brothers closet at night around 1am ready to smoke with the window open with the only light source being the street light from our cul-de-sac where we lived in. What I remember was that everything was going good until halfway through the blunt I started to hear my heartbeat race faster and faster accompanied by an immense disturbing fear. I immediately felt like I coudnt stop it and was stuck and felt I was being controlled whilst on a way to a horrible high. I had been hearing music during this time and took off my headphones as soon as I got the accelerating heartbeat and fear. I tried to calm myself down by just putting the blunt down and relaxing as much as possible in the outdoor chair I had been sitting in. During the fear I had felt like hearing an emergency alarm go off in my head and I kept hearing in my head repeat 'dam this must be to be stuck in a high' and felt as if I was watching myself through a screen being controlled all whilst in utter fear while hearing my heart beat so hard. My controlled self then goes to my phone because I still felt I was stuck in the high watching myself through a screen at that time and I see myself just scrolling through a sports app like nothing so quick with no stop for what felt like 10 seconds when really I had no idea of the time because myself didn't even glimpse at the time. I don't know how but I looked up to the only light source which was the streetlight out of the window and it somehow kicked me back in and I tried to get the hell out of that room. I remembered I was still trying to be quiet and not get caught so I closed the window but left the blunt there. I looked to the doorknob and I stood up and closed the window and went to the doorknob and felt everything was rejecting any motive to the doorknob like I needed to be kept there. I did somehow get to the doorknob and got out of my brothers room and went straight to my room and got in the covers with the fan on lights off. I looked at the time and it was around 2:30 and remembered I couldn't sleep at all and slept only about 3 hours and didn't feel nothing like the same the next day. No one except my parents were in the house and my parents were asleep downstairs. Every time I smoked before it'd be with my sister which was the one I always normally smoked with and I had nothing but great experiences. It's been a month and ever since that day I felt off and was given depressive thought that questioned my existence. I think a week later I decided to smoke again with 3 friends because I thought I could reverse it and that it was just one bad high and that's it. It was at night at a park after work and it was two blunts shared between four of us. I took a couple of hits and then the panic attack hit me again and I knew it was because my heart was beating fast again and my vision zoned out again. I told my friends about this and they calmed me down. I think like the first bad high it was derealization because I felt i was in a movie and had the feeling something that something was coming for me. I did feel controlled again and the feeling of seeing myself through a screen think I somehow acquired anxiety from the first bad high because i had gotten high several times before the bad high and had great experiences with my sister. Never smoking again because I have depressing and scary thoughts about where one ends up when he's dead and I am scared of time and had already had an anxiety attack at work when I've never had these before the first bad high. I think it might be the weeds effect still in my system since the last time I smoked was about 3 weeks ago. I've taken genuine xanax from a known plug and it has helped me feel better but I'd brather not rely my healing on those. I've read the symptoms of how people go through benzos and psychiatry and all that but just like sane person I still think it's all in my head. Yesterday was my homecoming game and I went with a couple of friends while I was on a single bar(xanax) and everything felt normal. I still get scary thoughts of time and am sensitive to my own existence and free will of the future and I don't know if it's OCD and Anxiety mixed with Derealization or a Realizition-Crisis. I'm still confident and hoping it's the weed in my system washing off and the anxiety because of the unnecessary fear but I need a response from someone who can provide just hope or help
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hypercat jzo18
Posted
That's what can happen when you take drugs like this. My advice is to avoid them completely as they can mess with your head and cause permanent damage.
wayne1962 jzo18
Posted
Hi jzo18 - is that your age? 18? How long have you been smoking weed? The human brain isn't fully developed until the age of 25. The teen brain is influenced by the amygdala - the emotional part responsible for basic survival like fight or flight - while the adult brain is influenced by the reasoning part of the frontal cortex. It would be wise to quit ingesting marijuana. The use of xanax to deal with the panic may be useful for a while, but you should be aware that it is a highly addictive med. Give the situation time - drug free - and see what happens.
jzo18 wayne1962
Posted
I've been smoking weed since 17 and I have a theory that the cause of the panic attack is me continuously smoking different strains. I just smoked yesterday with my sister and my brother in law and that was the first time in a month. I had a great experience but I was scared of basically having another attack or fearing again. I felt happy throughout the whole high. When I had the first panic attack I was completely by myself and had no one to calm me down. I'm convinced all I saw were illusions but man it was scarring scary illusion
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