People are rubbish

Posted , 7 users are following.

I know there are a lot of people out there who do not have depression but act as a great support for those who have it and I hope you all have a friend/relative you can talk to when things get tough who helps. 

I personally have only ever experienced the opposite, it doesn't matter how much you are there for someone as soon as the shoe is on the other foot and you need help they bolt, or are simply not interested/can't be bothered to talk things through and help you out. 

Maybe this is just my own experience with people or maybe it's because the people I choose to talk to don't understand depression, they expect to be able to ignore you and hide whilst you are going through a really tough day and don't understand when the "tough day" is every day. 

I think it's easier to just put the mask on and agree with these people that you are fine, rather than constantly getting let down. 

Sorry for the rant - and I hope you are all having a lovely Thursday!

4 likes, 29 replies

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  • Posted

    Hi fee, I know exactly what you mean. You have to very lucky to have support during mental illness. I 've seen people have that from their family  but I've never had that. My experience has been just like yours. I have learnt not to expect it and so I genarlly don't go out of my way for anyone any more. I don't have  anything but casual conversations now. I;m lucky that i have my son and we stand by each other. I have the company of my dogs who bring joy and love into my life, Some times having mental illness can bring out the worse in others. They can take advantage or become bullies. I come on this site because if I can help someone then they won't experience the loneliness I did.Is there a centre near you where you can go to during the day where you can talk with others experiencing similar feelings. Cities usually have them.
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    • Posted

      Hi Barbara, definitely agree with you there and I'm sad to hear you have had a similar experience to me, it's very hard. It's sad in a way but I think sticking to those casual conversations and no more is the only way to stop being let down by others and after putting in so much of your own time to support/listen to somebody and being shot down when you seek the same from them is genuinely an awful thing for anyone to do.

      I am glad to hear that you have your son and of course your dogs, whenever I go to stay with my parents for a while my dog there brings so much happiness into my life, they help a lot more than "friends"! 

      This site is a great place to go for help, the people here have always been so supportive and understanding and it's just a shame that not everybody is like that. I'm moving around quite a lot as I am currently leaving University, moving home for two months and then moving to a new city, so there may be a centre for help soon but, in the mean time I have this site at least! 

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  • Posted

    Hi I agree I have a friend who has depression like me only hers goes away alot quicker than mine. I help her as much as I can when she's ill but as soon as I'm ill she's nowhere to be seen. I feel Really low tired and anxious today and am going out tonight but dreading it. I just want to be well but can't seem to pull myself out of this hole. Sometimes I think coming off my meds might help so fed up of feeling like this and I don't even kbow why. I have a great family who love me no other relatives really but why am I feeling so bad alk the time. Maybe meds do strip you of yourself? Hope you're having a better day.

    Chris

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    • Posted

      I'm really sorry to hear that you are struggling so much sad 

      It is unfair of her to treat you that way but, I 100% know the feeling your situation sounds a lot like mine, my friend feels low and I help him, I help anyone who comes to me and is struggling. But when you ask for the same, the "friends" don't want to know! 

      Maybe you should talk to your GP about trying some different medication? If it isn't helping you then don't let it be, definitely go and see what else they can offer you. Even more talking therapy/mindfulness sessions? 

      Depression is the one thing that does not discriminate, I constantly ask myself why I went for so long feeling perfectly happy and yet now can barely pull myself out of bed. 

      Take it easy today, maybe your night out will help, I hope it does. 

      You always have the people on here to support you smile

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    • Posted

      Hi fee thanks for replying. I think you're right I keep well for 3 months then bang ill again. Been feeling like this since Feb. Lithium has been mentioned to me so I think I seriously have to consider it. Ive tried quite a few antidepressant in the past. I'm at the end of my tether at the moment. The more anxious I feel the more my ears Ring too. It's horrible.

      Thank you for listening xx

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    • Posted

      That sounds awful Chris, it can be very daunting taking medication, especially when it doesn't seem to be doing the job and all you want is to feel well again. It's a horrible place to be when you are trying but nothing seems to be making the difference you need, but you can do it and you will get there eventually - it just takes a lot of time and trial and error unfortunately. 

      I really hope you find the right meds/help for you, in the mean time we are all here whenever you need us smile xxx

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    • Posted

      Thank you that's very kind of you. Can't wait to have something sorted out. My heart is beating through my chest today and I don't know why.

      Thanks for your support xx

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    • Posted

      Oh I hope you're ok. I know what you mean. So nice that someone knows what your on about and knows how you feel. Are you on meds if you don't mind me asking?
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    • Posted

      It took me many times to actually make an appointment with doctor because I kept putting the phone down I was so annxious.  Well done for booking an appointment.  I know exactly how yiou felt.

      I am a lot better than I was, but have had depression very many years.  Aren't the people here great?  Look at all the support we give each other.  I do hope your doctor is helpful.

      Take care, and big hugs xx

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  • Posted

    I agree with you, fee. People don't want to know and I feel so guilty phoning people to tell them I'm feeling miserable.
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  • Posted

    Well done on making the appointment Fee, stay strong, tell the doctor everything, try not to panic and report back after. We are here for you
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  • Posted

    Thank you, all! smile 

    Even though the people in the physical world around me are useless, the people on this site help, understand and care - and at least we all have that! 

    xxx

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