Photos to someone else

Posted , 9 users are following.

My wife is the one wih depression and although i keep trying to reassure her that i love her and things in our past are not her fault she thinks I have no reason to stay no matter what i say! She goes from wanting to leave me to her trying to make me leave.

This afternoon I went onto our shared email to check some details and found some emails that she has been sending to someone. No words really just photo's of her head and cleavage.  I dont think they have met as yet but after doing some digging I know he's not too far away but I'm not sure what to do to be honest! Is this another attempt to push me away or is this the start of something? Should I confront her, wait and see what happens or do what she seems to want and leave her?

Why is there nothing to help us partners!!

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  • Posted

    Really sorry to hear about this Bill, it sounds awful rolleyes 

    First of all...depression makes you feel as though you don't deserve love from others, it doesn't mean she doesn't love you or appreciate everything that you do - it's this bully in her brain that is probably telling her every day just how much better off you will be without her and how she'll never be enough.

    Depression can also make you do things you would not usually do, so yes, she may be doing this to push you away - she may not really understand herself why she is doing it at all. I definitely cannot condone her behaviour but, as you are aware, it is a complex situation

    If I were you, I would confront her, maybe do it as gently as you can to get the most from her in terms of a response. 

    It's very sad that depression has such a hard effect on those around us, especially those closest to us and you sound like an incredibly loving husband, she is very lucky to have you. 

    Stay strong and I hope it all works out for the best for you. 

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  • Posted

    Wow so sorry to hear about your situation. I'm a female and some females tend to be complicated. Sometimes they may want the total opposite of what they potray. Especially when they're in a depression. At the time they feel helpless and they tend to push people away. I would give it some time. sit her down and talk to her about the emails. It was wrong of her to do that but who knows, she might have done is because she wanted the attention. If that's the case maybe it would benefit the both of you if she talks to counselor about her issues. Then the pieces will fall together. But don't let this interfere with your happiness. Take care of yourself to. Hope all goes well.
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    • Posted

      I agree with Lauren. Women are strange. I am one myself smile

      and while my new date is moving farther away from me these last few days I still don't go after him. I excuse his diminishing interest with "can't blame him, who would want to date someone like me". He possibly thinks I am just not interested.

      talk to your wife. See what she says. Either she wanted the feeling of being "still interesting" to men (then you may consider to excuse her behaviour) or she is literally trying to drive you away because she thinks you are better off without her anyway...

      women think differently. And now add depression. I don't understand myself, how is anyone else to u derstand my irrational behaviour?

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  • Posted

    I have deleted the sub discussion that has turned into an argument. While posts are users' own opinions please respect other users and do not post controversial comments that are likely to cause offence. If you think a post needs checking then use the Report link to draw it to our attention rather than getting into disagreements or "reacting" with personal attacks which can result in account suspension.

    Regards,

    Alan

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