Please someone help

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imageI am.sorry for the disturbing picture but I really am starting to get scared the swelling inside my anus its so hard to even put a suppositirie inside as its so swollen. everytime I go to see a doctor or specialist they say they don't want to do the operation as it is to painful and I may lose control of my bottom. they suggested banding again which I have done twice before with no success but its getting to a point where I am in so much pain and swelling and itching around 10 at night and then again normally around 3 in the morning it starts again. I decided to take a picture of what it looks like when its out thats everytime I go to the toilet normally once in the morning so thats what I have been doing the last time I took a picture i noticed I have gone from 7 piles to now 4 but half of it is a purple red which is whats scaring me as its so swallon inside.

has anyone ever been this bad with a flair up it started on the 11th of August to now the external pile has shrunk but I can still feel it but the ones inside are the ones that are hurting the most strange thing is no bleeding at all

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    Do the surgery im a 47 year old female i had 2 internal hemms and i couldnt take the pain so i went to proctologist and decided to get the hemorroidectemy yes after its painful i was scared to have a BM after 3 days i haad 1 i thought i was going to die i was on valium and oxy u need 2-3 weeks to recover its been 4 weeks for me i think and im good lost some weight its the most pain ive ever had but i have no regrets

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