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I feel really messed up, up until the begin of this week I was coping ( to a fashion ) fight my anxiety. But somethings snapped and I just end in tears. I had been to my GP who increased my mirtazapine from 30mg to 45mg but after 7 days I began to feel suicidal.
I am self employed and as a result end up losing work this week as I am not fit. :0(. I start on Venaflaxine today twice a day and just pray I can stabilise my life and move on from this blip. It's been 12 months since I ever fel this way I whilst I knew I wasn't fixed I thought the management was getting there.
Seems depression is the hardest thing to fix :0(
The guilt I feel and pressure from family ( who are only trying to help ) to take it easier but not to lose work etc etc is really tough. It makes me question whether self employment was the best way forward, and I have worked so hard for the last 2 month too.
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