Road to recovery

Posted , 3 users are following.

Hi all,

I’ve been feeling really good for the last couple of days but I just wanted to share a few things with everyone.

So I’ve been feeling really good for the last couple of days and almost like I enjoy things a lot more such as going to the gym or watching TV without thinking what’s the point in doing these things If I’m going to die one day? Or how can anyone relax on TV when they’re going to die one day?

I just feel as if though I’m always thinking inwards about myself whereas before when I never had my depression and anxiety I suppose we all you used to do things automatically. I just feel sometimes can I possibly be how I was before or has my depression completely sent me insane or crazy because it’s weird how one day you can feel ok and the next couple of days you’re down in the dumps. Does anybody else feel like this? I suppose I worry will I ever completely feel how I was before even though things weren’t that great.

Also another thing that has been worrying me is that I was studying at college a couple of days ago and we were discussing the link between dementia and depression and of course my brain the way it is decided it would be funny to torment me because In my head that’s worse than dying because you probably won’t even recall it happening and it scares me, even though my memory is actually really good, but I just finding myself now having to remember everything otherwise it scares me that one day I could suffer from this.

Does anyone have any advice on the road to recovery? Is all that matters how I feel now and not what I felt before that’s been and gone? It’s just a strange feeling I suppose how it can be there one second and lift another.

Appreciate any advice or your own personal experience, Thanks guys.

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  • Posted

    Hi Paul, It is true that none of us will get out of this alive.I'm sure everyone thinks of that sometime in their life. Me too. I always think about the way I will go that will also make you think too much.Not to make light of your subject the worst thing you can do is stay inside your head and think about things. I feel I am in the same situation as you. I'm 57 years old and feel like my life is over and I'm just waiting on the grim reaper. But that isn't happening so I'm trying to get help myself. Best thing I can tell you is get to your GP, Doctor or health care professional to help you through this. In the mean time, try to pick up a book or TV show that interests you and delve into it. Try to get yourself out of yourself and focus on things outside of you instead of inside. This has helped me quite a bit. Yet, these are the things I try to do. Everyone is different and that is why I suggest a professional help you. At this time I think you are young and I wouldn't put to much stock into dementia because that usually happens much later in life. For now, just live day by at a time. Don't get ahead of yourself. What ever you were doing that was keeping you happy, I would keep trying that. If that doesn't work I would see a doctor anyway. So, Good luck to you and hope it works out well for you.
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  • Posted

    What medication are you on Paul? I have been on 30 mg Mirtazapine for 2 weeks and like you I have a good day and I think at last I am on the way to recovery. Then I am back to feeling down for a couple of days. Everyone says it can take 4 - 6 weeks to feel better. But I am losing hope but as I have tried several antidepressants I am loathe to go back to my GP.
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  • Posted

    Hi Paul

    When i started on my long road to recovery i saw an NHS counsellor who said i turned every situation into a disaster, like worst case scenario. This was not quite true and my counsellor since then has been much more understanding.

    As Pat says, i think it would be good for you to seek professional help on this if only to get things in perspective. The early days on SSRI's play havoc with the mind not knowing whether it will be a good day or a bad one and with no warning either.

    I was very apprehensive about talking about my feelings to a stranger as i am a very private person but i got to the stage where i couldn't cope on my own any more. I've had some wonderful insights into my thought processes from my counsellor and they don't always mean what i think they do (if that makes any sense).

    At some point on whichever drug you are on, you will reach a plateau where ups and downs level out.

    It may sound sad, but i can't remember what i was like before the depression. My mood flatlines most of the time...neither happy or sad which is far better than the wild mood swings of the early days. I'm content with that.

    Try and think positively and do stuff you enjoy on the good days. Let the bad days pass and don't fight them....another good day will be around the corner.

    Best wishes and i hope soon that there will be many more good days.

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  • Posted

    Thanks for the advice guys it really helps to hear other people's opinons on this because no one really understands what were going through apart from people that have experienced it.

    Hi Patricia, I haven't taken any antidepressants yet but I've been given Mirtazapine to start tonight so hopefully it does the trick.

    It just upsets that I might have this outlook on life forever! I want to go back into my little bubble where I get mad or annoyed over silly things when you're depressed you see life as a big picture I suppose.

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